As was reported in the NY Times back in 2007, the NASCAR Harlequins have some specific rules by which they must abide: no sex, no crashes, no drugs, no alcohol use in the content of the story.
Back in 2007, Mark Dyer, VP of licensing for NASCAR, said in the article,
“Look at our stats. Forty percent of our fans are women, and among younger fans it’s trending toward 50-50.” He added that according to Nascar surveys 72 percent of female fans enjoy reading and are more likely than nonfans to purchase books.
This is particularly interesting (and somewhat laughable) in light of Kasey Kahne's Tweetstream yesterday, in which he called a woman breast feeding “nasty”:
And in case you missed that last part, he then told @knittingrad, who told him he was being a douchebag, “Your a dumb bitch.”
All of these screen caps are courtesy of @scatx, who later called out Farmers Insurance, one of Kahne's sponsors, asking if they condoned his behavior.
Ok, first, I cannot let this opportunity pass:
Your: something that belongs to you.
You're: You are.
Let's try that in context!
You're being horribly sexist, Kasey Kahne, and your misogyny is really unattractive considering the number of female NASCAR fans.
If NASCAR is a family sport, one must assume some of those family members were breastfed.
And while I'm hanging out here, let me just take a paragraph and screech: Why is breastfeeding in public still a problem for so many people? What the hell? Do people stare at other diners in a restaurant, unable to look away as they eat? It's a breast. Get over it. You need to see some? Go look at a romance novel cover from the 80s. And some of the ones online.
And as someone who was unable to breastfeed, I hate the shaming and pressure I received to breastfeed (even though I couldn't), and I hate the pressure that those who choose to do so receive from people who can't mind their own damn business. The issue of breastfeeding is such a contentious battlefield. You'd think Mr. Kahne would have the smarts to not voice his rather dimwitted opinion on Twitter – which then fed directly to his Facebook page, where more people supported his comments than argued with him.
But back to Mr. Kahne.
Kahne's response was to delete the tweets and go back to talking about Christmas (I wonder if Santa was breastfed?) but screen caps and angry fans lit a stream of crank ass on KnittingRad and Scatx.
KnittingRad is taking it all in stride:
Kahne tweeted later that he was “Glad everyone had a good Christmas! Thanks for all the feedback. I gained some new perspectives today.”
Wow, that's miles short of an apology, isn't it? I was waiting for the completely flaccid, “I'm sorry if anyone was offended” apology from Kahne. I'm almost disappointed.
Makes me wonder about NASCAR and romance, though. Harlequin NASCARs have the no crashing, no drugs and alcohol, no sex rules. Does that also apply to breastfeeding? Good lord, maybe there's no breasts in NASCAR romance.
No, that can't be right. I've watched NASCAR. There's definitely breasts, both in the stands belonging to women fans, many of whom are mothers, and in the restricted areas, belonging to women hired to promote various products.
It's rather stunning to see misogyny and sexist comments about breastfeeding from a NASCAR driver, especially considering the percentage of female fans of the sport, and NASCAR's effort to reach them with branded products like Harlequin novels. Perhaps the solution is more breastfeeding in NASCAR novels, lots and lots of breastfeeding.
Then we make Kasey Kahne read them all.
ETA: 9:38pmET. Via simba's comment below, Kasey Kahne has apologized for his Tweets via his Facebook page, saying “I understand that my comments regarding breastfeeding posted on Twitter were offensive to some people. For that, I apologize. It was in no way my intention to offend any mother who chooses to breastfeed her child, or, for that matter, anyone who supports breast feeding children.
In all honestly, I was surprised by what I saw in a grocery store…. I respect the mother's right to feed her child whenever and wherever she pleases.”
Excellent discussion.
Sarah, I’m really sorry you were subjected to the tyranny of the breastfeeding fundamentalists. Personally, I think that breastfeeding is very good for babies – but if you’re unable to, or don’t want to do it, there is a very good alternative and no mother should be made to feel ashamed, regardless of her decision.
I’m in the UK. I chose to breastfeed both my babies (now 19 and 15) – and did so in public when I couldn’t find anywhere else to take them (which was often the case). I rarely felt comfortable about it because other people’s reactions were rarely favourable – why on earth do people feel embarassed or disgusted by the sight of a baby feeding? It makes no sense to me. How, or why, is a baby feeding from a breast, disgusting? Why are some of us so sqeamish/prudish/judgemental/hypocritical? – perhaps these questions could/should be addressed. I feel every baby has a right to be fed on demand rather than having to scream themself sick until a ‘suitable’ location can be found.
In Canada breastfeeding is considered a human right and women are not allowed to be told to stop under most circumstances. It’s not unusual to see women breastfeeding on the subway, or at shopping centres, or in parks. I’ve never seen it in a grocery store, but most grocery stores don’t have good seating, and I imagine most women would rather sit down to feed the baby.
There’s been a lot of breastfeeding moms who support Kasey’s side of this. Its a matter of having a little consideration since being in public is about being in the eyes of society and unless you are trying to instigate controversy, its simply inappropriate. And what happened when she did it? CORRECT: She instigated something that lead to probably hundreds of articles on the web about a celebrity when it could all have been avoided.
Actually, all she “instigated” was the feeding of her kid. Kasey Kahne opened his moronic mouth and instigated the rest. Credit where credit is due.
I’m from Tennessee and I breastfed all 4 of my kids, and out in public (always discreetly) when necessary. Got a few rude comments to be sure but I wasn’t shy about telling folks to mind their own business…and if they didn’t they deserved what came next. My kids were healthy and happy in every way and that’s what mattered. Most of my family (backwoods Natives and mountain folk) prefer to feed our offspring the “natural way” as its a darned sight cheaper than bottles and formula and always handy.
I’ve always been amazed that a woman can walk around with everything but her nipples and twat exposed and that’s not considered offensive but breastfeeding an infant even with a light cover over the baby and bared breast is. People need to get a grip on priorities.
As for Kahne’s reaction…as my grandmother once observed sometimes the only difference between men and boys is the length of their pants and the price of their toys. Fortunately some boys actually do manage to grow up and some of us are fortunate enough to find one.
True, there is no excuse for insulting or intimidating someone else for making a choice oneself might not agree with. Whether a woman chooses to feed her child by breast or bottle, it’s HER choice.
See, that doesn’t quite work as an argument. If you went to Iran, and knew that not wearing the hijab would offend even normal, non-terrorist Muslims, you’d probably wear a hijab while in that country. A country’s culture dictates how you act while immersed in that culture. And, like it or not, North America is quite prudish when it comes to body parts (although body parts being DISMEMBERED is okay. God forbid those body parts are nipples, though!).
And yes, I definitely think that people should work towards breastfeeding in public being okay, but I don’t think whipping it out in full view of a grocery store full of people is the way to do it. Finding a quiet corner where you’ll avoid offending as many people as possible isn’t that much of a hardship anywhere I’ve been with a nursing mother.
Nascar has books? That seems like such a jackalope-like critter… *scratches head*
Wearing the hijab in Irah is not custom. It is the law, and not wearing it can get you in serious trouble, so I’m going to say your first example is truly dreadful. (What’s more, just over 30 years ago, Western dress was common in Iran, and the wearing of the hijab was strictly optional.) Now, take a country like Morocco. Some women veil; some don’t. Or take the US, which is the country in question. Some women veil—not just to abide by the custom of the hijab, but perhaps because they are Christian nuns, Orthodox Jews, or (to extend the notion of the veil slightly) Old-Order Mennonites or Amish. Most women don’t veil. The dominant culture of the United States finds covering one’s hair to be a symbol of oppression, repression, or misogyny, but one way that women who *choose* to veil fight that is by wearing their coverings proudly in public, and not allowing others to shame them for the way they embrace their faiths or ideals.
In fact, the only way to change people’s attitudes is not to hide one’s self. Your argument that a breastfeeding mother should “find a quiet corner” (and that’s so easily done in places like shopping malls!) sounds rather a lot like things I’ve heard from, say, my rather homophobic grandmother: “I don’t care what people do in their own homes, but do they have to *flaunt* it?” Insisting that *perfectly legal* challenges to the status quo keep themselves quiet and unassuming in order not to offend anyone means that the status quo will not change. It will simply permit those who don’t conform to exist, as long as they are in no way disruptive to those who are uncomfortable with their existence.
Kahne is not from the south, he is from Washington State.
He would be very saddened to know that not only am I a NASCAR fan, but I have on more than one occasion breastfed my son without a cover in the infield during a race.
Maybe he doesn’t feel like racing anymore?
I admit that before I was a mom (daughter is now 6 years old) I was bothered by the idea of a mom nursing in public i.e. a restaraunt. I’d talk to my husband about it not being appropriate – wouldn’t be so daring to comment to the woman or the staff about it because I KNEW BETTER! And, now I know even better because I have nursed my baby/toddler everywhere, and never covered, it was too damn hard to nurse with a cover. So, I’m not a breastfeeding nazi just in spite of myself… but rather making up for my previous ignorance. See, not enough of us are exposed to this natural thing called breastfeeding growing up, so we somehow got made to feel uncomfortable around it. I think the 80’s really messed us up. Hopefully, more and more women will take a lesson from these social faux paus blunders of these celebrities and learn more about breastfeeding before their take their right of passage into motherhood and feel more confident in nourishing their baby. Thank goodness for Al Gore inventing the internet so we can breastfeeding nazis can ban together and show our mama bear claws and get people on the right track (a little tongue in cheek).
What is really bad about Kasey Kahne’s comment is he said this to one of his followers… someone who was undoubtedly a fan. Come on.
Lets all take a breath.
To start, why can’t the facts be presented in the story completely? We do know that Kasey Kahne made some remarks regarding a woman breast feeding. They have been well documented. Most websites leave out the woman’s verbage in her retort, such as “you’re kind of a douchebag” (oops almost used your instead of you’re) and “stay classy a**hole”, like this website did. Is that reason for Kasey to respond to her the way he did? No. He has apologized to her for that in a tweet to her and invited her to direct message him to discuss it further if she wished. He has also apologized via his facebook regarding the entire matter. I’m sure he means it because I know he is not an oger.
Next, all this talk about him being an uneducated hillbilly. Please. He graduated from high school, in the state of Washington, early to persue his goal of racing for a living. If he hadn’t been upset for being tagged a “douchebag” I’m sure he would have paid more attention to his use of your rather than you’re. That is not to say that one’s use of your/you’re is a good barometer of one’s overall IQ.
Is this a reason to vilify him in the media, including social media? Do we discount that one of the very first things he did when he signed a contract is start a foundation which has raised hundreds of thousands of dollars for childrens charities? Do we string him up for an error in judgement that he now regrets? Have none of us ever said or done anything we regret? Not just to anonymous strangers, but to those we love? He was a kid like our kids, except he loved to race, and poured his every spare minute into it to achieve his goal but, he has tried and is trying to use it for good. He screwed up in a public way- that is a fact. The next time your husband or wife screws up, are you going call his or her employer and attempt get him or her fired, or are we just going to consider Kasey losing his livelihood worth it to move our cause forward or feel we’ve defended our legitemate right to breastfeed? I really HOPE we can find another way to achieve that particular goal.
“Let’s all take a deep breath.”
Is there a more condescending, presumptuous way to begin a post, particularly as an introduction?
Do you really think there is any chance at all that his livelihood is at risk over this? Or that people are looking to “string him up?“Talk about needing to take a deep breath. He chose to tweet, and people reacted. It’s unrealistic for people as a whole to stay silent over something they find to be offensive.
I’m not sure that now is a good time to point out that a sports figure who is under fire is involved with starting a children’s charity, but I get that this was an unintentional bit of irony.
If someone called me a bitch and then suggested we talk about it privately, I’d be overwhelmed at how I’d thought he was being just about as inappropriate as he could get, and yet he managed to top it.
The reason you feel he means it is because he’s not an ogre? This seems pretty circular, like a NASCAR race.
Also, there is a context here. This is a site about romance novels, and there is a series of books set in the NASCAR world. NASCAR clearly realizes there are female fans who might want to buy these books, but this person very publicly disrespected women. You aren’t here to discuss the context, because you are probably doing some sort of whirlwind mansplaining tour, and don’t care about what the actual discussion is about, the community you entered, or the books in question.
If I’ve offended you, I suggest you just take a deep breath.
“The issue of breastfeeding is such a contentious battlefield. You’d think Mr. Kahne would have the smarts to not voice his rather dimwitted opinion on Twitter”
As women of child-bearing age, most of us do know that the topic of breastfeeding is contentious. I doubt that Mr. Kahne did, and I suspect that most other men don’t either. I’m sure that he has the sensation of starting to drive through a puddle after a hurricane and discovering that ducks are swimming across it as his car slowly goes submarine. His comment was ignorant, but he ain’t ignorant anymore.
Personally, I feel that the “dumb bitch” comment was vulgar but earned. Some people might rise above being called a douchebag and an asshole on a social media site, but Mr. Kahne was clearly not up to that challenge. In all fairness, while breast milk and urine may not be equivalent, I think personal insults are. It. Is. Not. More o.k. for a woman to name call than a man.
I have to say that the discussion that followed from this incident has been really fascinating. The most interesting observation to me was SB Sarah’s correlation of attitudes towards breastfeeding with the length of available maternity leave. My own experience definitely supports this connection. Back in the 70s, I breastfed my oldest daughter primarily because I felt it was the right thing to do. The prevailing zeitgeist strongly promoted the practice, though I knew I’d be back at work in 6 weeks. Unfortunately, neither the constant anxiety nor the breast pump was my friend, and the well went dry shortly after I returned to work. Except for the guilt factor, I wasn’t particularly bothered by it. Thing is, there shouldn’t have been a guilt factor.
I recall a professor of mine observing that other countries did not place the same value on job uber alles that we do in the U.S. In most conflicts between employment and family needs, our culture expects family to step down. In a truly family friendly culture, one would expect breastfeeding to be far more common and, one would hope, far less comment-worthy. Perhaps in such a social climate, this most personal of choices would no longer be burdened by political implications.
I nver realised how lucky I was! Breastfed all five of mine for a year (that’s each, not collectively…) and never, NEVER had a single derrogatory comment passed in my direction. I learned to pop the baby under my jumper, none of them complained (although it does explain why they all like to eat their dinner under a blanket..) and, by the time number 5 came along, I was pretty adept at feeding whilst doing almost anything. This is in Britain, mostly very rural, I have to admit, but I feel really fortunate not to have come across the prejudice and unpleasantness that seem to be rife. Or maybe I just had a really SCARY expression…
It’s OK….we already know from South Park that NASCAR drivers have to be poor, inbred, and incredibly stupid to participate. So these kinds of statements are normal for them.
“I honestly don’t understand why, unless it’s ridiculously hot out, draping a blanket over yourself is considered to somehow be “wrong” or “bowing to the pressure of prudes,” or whatever the argument is.”
I don’t think it’s wrong at all! Anyone who’s offended by public breastfeeding is more than welcome to drape a light blanket over their face, as far as I’m concerned. Perhaps such people might consider carrying one with them at all times, just to be prepared.
That is SO well put! Ugh, that particular urinating/breastfeeding analogy just totally disgusted me.
According to her “boobies are for fun and involving a child in them is sick”. Nice isn’t it!!