Catriona wrote in the Heyer/Grand Sophy thread:
Sarah, can we do a thread on romances that we want to love, we should have loved, everybody else loves them…but that we can’t stand because something just left a bad taste in our mouths?
I like this idea for two reasons. No, three. First, we’ve done it before. But let’s do a new one. It’s been years.
Second: not enjoying a book that it seems like everyone loved or enjoyed can be an isolating experience, but as I’ve learned on the internet, you’re never alone in your likes and dislikes, no matter how outlandish they might seem. 0_o
And third: everyone’s buttons are different (woo, kinky!). What ticks me off may not bother you in the slightest, and vice versa. For example, and I’ve used this example before: there are many who are intensely bothered by historical inaccuracies in romances. I am not one of these people. The Duke can in fact drive a Porsche to Almack’s, and I’m fine with it. Whatever.
My hot button is stilted, unrealistic and awkward dialogue. If characters, like, for example, the Duke of Porsche, say things that real human beings wouldn’t say, and use cliches to the point that they don’t sound like actual people, I get really annoyed. Yanks me right out of the story and into Land of Crankypants. But the Porsche? Meh. Whatever.
I am not alone in that preference, but I do think that among romance readers, especially historical romance fans, I’m in the minority. And this is not to insult any author who busts her ass doing the research. Go on with your bad self – and your Porsche.
Catriona’s example is a bit more specific:
My example is As You Desire by Connie Brockway. Everybody is in love with this book and it always appears on people’s top romances list. I should love it – I enjoyed Brockway’s other books, I’m crazy about Egypt and archaeology and I love romances that are supposed to be funny and witty. It had everything going for it.
But I’m telling you, this book is like my own personal berserk button. To this day, I still can’t think about it or hear somebody sing its praises without my blood pressure spiking. My issue is with the way the author set up an “older” woman (I think she was in her early 30’s) to be the younger heroine’s foil. Basically, the older woman was rejected by the hero and pretty much every male in the book because she wasn’t as “perfect” as the seemingly smarter, blonder, younger heroine. I would expect this kind of ageism/blondeism in a book from the 1970’s, but this book was from 1997! This passage in particular, in which Marta, the other woman, sees the heroine at a restaurant, encompasses everything that bothers me about this book:
“I say,” Lord Ravenscroft suddenly breathed, “Now, there is a treasure worth coveting. Have you ever seen such a piece of tiny, golden perfection?”
…Marta followed the direction of everyone’s gaze to where Miss Carlisle’s progress through the room was marked by a wave of men scurrying to their feet as she passed.
To blatantly steal a phrase from you, Sarah: OH COME ON NOW AND I MEAN IT! Is this supposed to be a parody? Because it fails if it is. I ended up feeling whole lot more sympathy for Marta, while I wanted to bury Desdemona Carlisle headfirst in the sand. Normally the perfect, blonde, child prodigy, men-literally-fall-at-her-feet woman is the RIVAL, not the heroine.
Maybe I’m letting this bother me way too much…. But somewhere deep down, it grates on me that the heroine has to be this drop-dead gorgeous, “oh save me” frail young creature. I often wonder why people loved this book so much when I, who was much closer to Desdemona’s age when I read it, was so bothered by the discrimination against the older, more experienced, more capable other woman.
I got to wondering, is this just a case of me finding it difficult to relate to the heroine, and seeing myself as a rival to her to the hero? Nah, I thought Harry was an idiot too. His famous “you are my Egypt” speech just made me cringe. I would’ve heaved if anyone said anything so ridiculous to me, but apparently a lot of readers disagree judging by the links out there:
I fully expect the pitchforks and torches to come after me on this one, but bring it! Catriona “Encyclopedia Hittanica” is ready!
Ok, I’m about to come off even more objectionably: I have never read this book, but now I’m so very curious.
So, what’s your book that everyone adored, but you couldn’t enjoy it? You certainly don’t have to limit your example or response to this one. No shame and no shaming, please! Bring on your least liked books that made you feel the most isolated in your lack of enjoyment.
I don’t get vampires. Maybe, someday, I’ll pick up a book featuring a vampire and dearly love it despite the whole cannibalism thing (maybe its not cannibalism as the vampires are not actually people? Then we’re just prey? I dunno). I prefer that the men know the difference between their mate and their meal. Whatever.
So, there is a whole honking section of the bookstore that I don’t swoon over and that so many romance readers dearly love. And I love paranormal, fantasy, sci-fi. I just don’t get turned on by leeches.
@LizW65:
I didn’t read Merlin as autistic. But, you know, looking at her that way, just makes the whole thing that much worse. (And that view makes sense, given what I understand is Kinsale’s penchant for damaged protagonists.)
@ks:
I read a bunch of Laurens once upon a time, until it dawned on me that she wrote to a checklist. Alpha hero – check. Curious about sex heroine – check. Four step seduction of heroine – check. Doggie sex – check. Mirror sex – check. Sex morning, noon, and three times at night – check. (How do her characters ever have time for anything else? Don’t they ever get tired? Or chafed?) Inappropriate and excessive use of the various forms of the word “evoke” – check. Weak and non-existent plots – check. Egregious appearances by various Cynsters and their innumerable relations – check.
I tried one more time with her Black Cobra series. By the time I was half-way through the first book, I was paying more attention to the checklist than the story. I decided then that enough was enough, though I will still admit to a weakness for Vane Cynster.
I don’t hate Robin Schone’s books, but I don’t like them—- yet they fascinate me—-it’s like they’re written in this short-hand code that I can’t crack.
I can admit to hating Emily Giffin’s books (Something Borrowed and Baby Proof). For some reason I just don’t like her heroines.
I’m glad I’m not the only one who didn’t like Outlander. I threw the book across the room a few times. Spanking? Wham! Nessie? Wham! Rescue 1, 2, 3… Wham! Wham! Wham!
Fantastic post! I was actually just thinking about this the other day as I took in another lovefest of Karen Marie Moning’s Fever series.
I’ve read the entire Fever series and I don’t care for it. I like KMM’s Highlander series, but the Fever series and particularly it’s main characters, mostly Barrons, left a bad taste in my mouth. When is a male character an alpha male and when is he just an A-hole? For me Barrons was an A-Hole and I found very little redeeming about him. Of course it’s all my opinion, so I simply stay out of conversations about this series.
Also, I have never, aside from Wicked Lovely, been able to finish anything by Melissa Marr. She’s no doubt, a fantastic writer, but I cannot for the life of me get motivated enough by her characters, plot or prose to get past chapter 10 in any of her other books. I would never discourage anyone from reading her books, but I won’t read them. That’s all.
Thanks for letting me get that off my chest. I feel better.
1. Another thumbs down for Outlander. Struggled through 100 pages, just couldn’t deal with it any more.
2. Ditto for Auel’s “Earth’s Children” series. Found Clan of the Cave Bear unbearably (pun intended) boring.
3. Nora Roberts’ POV shifts don’t bother me, but there’s something quintessentially sleep-inducing about her style. Attention to every minute detail, maybe? Dunno, because I have never been able to finish one of her books. Ten pages, max. I have no clue what her appeal is. Not. A. Clue. Nice lady, but the books do nothing for me.
4. I love historicals, long saga-esque historicals. Absolutely loathe, despise, hate McNaught’s Kingdom of Dreams, which seems to top a lot of readers’ keeper lists. Loathe the heroine, loathe the hero, loathe the writing. Few books in my extensive collection have actually been physically banged against the wall; KoD has, and the only reason I still have the copy is I’m keeping it out of circulation and the first edition has a gorgeous Morgan Kane step-back. That was my first and last McNaught. Never,ever, ever again.
I could barely finish Lord Perfect by Loretta Chase. I thought it was so silly the way the heroine kept falling into the hero’s arms. I’ll try again with the other Chase books I have in my TBR pile.
I also couldn’t get into the JD Robb books—they’re probably too gritty for me.
Oh god, don’t even get me started on Hamilton. I bailed on that series as soon as I saw it was taking a hard left turn into pr0nland, and I haven’t ever been tempted to come back. Don’t get me wrong, her books weren’t stellar before that, but at least she occasionally had really striking imagery (a vampire self-immolating in the sunlight, surrounded by a cloud of his totem butterflies) and ideas (a vampire so old he wasn’t even Homo sapiens). Now… meh.
I’m also not a fan of Kelley Armstrong’s Bitten, I fear. It was a DNF for me—bailed about a hundred pages in when I got to the part where the male lead ties up the female lead. I was also irritated that she’d been sustaining a hate-on for ten years because he’d turned her into a werewolf, and yet all she could muster when confronting him was a pathetic little mutter of “you bit me”? For chrissakes, woman, YOU’RE A WEREWOLF. Snarl, can’t you? But really, my biggest objection to her was that she was actively lying to the person she was supposedly actually having a relationship, and seemed to have no compunction about that whatsoever. So very not cool.
Another vote for Kenyon.
Loved her characters at first. Adored Asheron. But after a while, I realized Kenyon’s writing sucked. Tell, tell, tell.
Not romance, but Anne Rice is another author I don’t read anymore. Being told a story through a character’s dialogue drove me up a wall. It’s like your brain has to keep up with 2 stories. One: character in coffee shop telling another character about his/her life. Then the story the character is telling. Ugh.
I’m so glad there are others who were not enchanted by Carriger’s Soulless. It was a bit difficult for me to even give it 50 pages (re: the Nancy Pearl Rule of 50). To be fair to the series, though, I think it might have to do with vampire and werewolf fatigue. And did I mention that I LOVE steampunk? Still, couldn’t do it.
Also, La Nora. I’ve tried a couple of her books and just could not finish them. Which is a shame, because Ms. Roberts seems to be a pretty awesome lady, and her work ethic is impressive to say the least.
As a general plot device, I can’t stand the constant bickering type of couple (did someone already mention this?). I’m re-reading the Belgariad by David Eddings (which is fantasy, not romance, but does feature a romance-ish storyline). I love, love, LOVE this series, but the constant fighting and pouting and misunderstandings between Garion and Ce’Nedra drive me nuts. Of course, they are just teenagers, so I guess that’s pretty accurate behavior. hahaha
Finally, I have to say that adultery plotlines really push my buttons (the bad buttons). This is one of the many reasons that I have never picked up the Outlander books.
Two words: Nora Roberts. Haven’t been able to go past the first couple of chapters of any of her books that I’ve ever tried. I gave up.
A few months ago, I DNF The Iron Duke. Then last week, I picked it up again and ended up falling in love with the book.
Nora Roberts has never done it for me.
@TiceB, Whitney My Love truly disturbed me, and I can’t believe so many people love that book. The only McNaught I’ve enjoyed is Kingdom of Dreams.
I’m glad to see so many anti-Outlander posts! I felt like I had to read it, even though the description really turned me off, but now I’m fine with avoiding it.
For me, Christine Feehan is one – I tried several of her books, and I’m still not sure what the appeal is. Her heroines always seemed to get stepped all over, and her heroes seemed to me to be the worst kind of Alphas. Shelly Laurenston may be another, but I don’t know if she necessarily counts, since I only gave her one shot (The Mane Event) and then couldn’t bring myself to try another one of her books. I just don’t like her humor as much as others seem to (too over-the-top for me), and for some reason the focus on certain aspects of the heroines’ physical characteristics (enormous breasts or big feet) annoyed me.
Jane Feather’s Beloved Enemy. Just … ugh … I made myself finish it, but it didn’t end up on the keeper shelf. It’s in a box full of books to be donated to the hospital or somewhere that will take them. I didn’t mind the first bit of the book, but the crap at the end just pushed it too far for me.
@Rae – OMG, I thought I’d never find another person who couldn’t stand the whole Wheel of Time crap fest! My husband (once upon a time when he actually read books) had them, so I got started on it … and I don’t remember which book it was exactly but I just knew it didn’t take that many pages to nuke the planet from orbit and let more intelligent life take over a few centuries later.
Usually I hate one or two characters – but I’ve never wanted the entire cast killed off as quickly as possible before. WoT fell into Anne Rice land for me – Interview was okay, but I just couldn’t get into anything after that. Took me longer to reach critical mass with WoT only because I wanted to like it. I love fantasy, but I’ll stick to the demented crap in my own head before I touch another one of those books.
Anything Danielle Steele. I can’t read past the first chapter. And, perhaps not exactly romance, but I couldn’t stand Water for Elephants. The prose and dialogue in that book were barely passable for me.
Oh, as far as Nora Roberts goes, I learned that I can only read certain “flavors” of her books. I can’t stand her romantic suspense, which is weird, because I love the books she writes as J.D. Robb (I avoided the In Death books for ages because I knew I hated Roberts’ romantic suspense). Although I hate her romantic suspense, I can plow through most of her lighter family-filled romances (The MacGregors books being a good example).
I couldn’t get into Outlander, Thea Harrison’s book, or Soulless by Gail Carringer. The Soulless character seemed to me to be a reincarnation of the Amelia Peabody character by Elizabeth Peters. And I couldn’t wrap my head around the mean of “soulless.” If a character doesn’t have soul, how do they function?
I liked J.D. Robb up to Origin in Death. The books after feelas though she is just writing to please her fans. It is frustrating because there is still a lot of potential in that series for character growth and mystery, but instead it feels unoriginal.
I really didn’t like Joanna Bourne’s first spymaster book – and haven’t read anything else by her. Also dislike Eloisa James and Julia Quinn for similar reasons – cutesy tone, ahistorical and vacant. And I know a lot of people rave about Carla Kelly but I find her books nauseatingly twee and implausible.
Am in full agreement with anti-Willig, anti-Twilight and anti-Hunger Games views, didn’t like Lord of Scoundrels, am relieved to see other people share my reservations about Kinsale. Did books 1, 2 and 3 of Outlander and then it jumped ship for me, never liked Anita Blake books, only ever read one Norah Roberts and I did the first Roarke/Dallas book meh.
All of this makes me wonder if I really like romance at all, but I do, I do. Nita Abrams, Janet Mullany and several Georgette Heyers are DIKs for me.
Books that I wanted to love but CAN’T…
Outlander – boring
Charlene Harris – Sookie Stackhouse Series – I’m sorry but to me Sookie is Too Stupid To Live. She irritates the heck out of me!
Kelley Armstrong – Bitten – Ugh, I forced myself to finish this. Was rooting for the anti-hero, because to me the hero was un-heroic. None of the issues btwn the hero and heroine ever got resolved. At the end I was so completely dissatisfied that I never want to read another book by her again. Meh.
If you enjoy Belgariad – try Redemption of Althalus. Everyone ends up paired off by the end. There’s some couple bickering, but it’s more of a teenage bickering like G&C.
My sister!!! We must spread the word of WTFery!
I don’t actually remember a rapey scene from The Iron Duke. Did I just block it out?
Anyway, I have to give another vote for Laurell K. Hamilton and Nora Roberts. I started out liking both, but both turned me off pretty quickly. Someone needs to tell LKH that a series of sex scenes involving an annoying woman with the Most Powerful Vagina in the World is not actually a novel. You need plot and character development for that. With Roberts, I just think you can tell where in her career she started hiring ghost writers, and all of the books after that point are deadly dull retreads of the books that came before.
Truly. Except heaven forbid a person not like WoT … Those fans scare me more than Twi-hards (or whatever they’re called. Haven’t read the Twilight saga, don’t think I’ll waste time on it either). Maybe because WoT books are thicker and would hurt more if used against a person.
Jane Eyre – even though I knew what the ending was, I kept hoping that it wasn’t, and when it was I was mad. I hated it and haven’t been able even to watch a TV or film version since watching it.
And not quite romance but sort of, The Time Traveller’s Wife. The whole premise was just so tragic to me.
And I’m afraid I’m another Cross Stitch/Outlander DNF. I wanted to like this book. I admire Diane Gabaldon’s research tons, but I just hated the heroine and the adultery.
And also Little Woman for the same reasons everyone else said. I loved Jo. I wanted to be Jo. Until she gave it all up.
I hate the Anita Blake books. I don’t mind the sex (although actually, PP is right—it’s amazing how unhot a lot of it actually is), but after three or four of them I just couldn’t take the WHINING. If Anita Blake were your friend, and she called you to piss and moan about how zomg she was having WAY TOO MUCH AMAZING SEX and was just a TERRIBLE PERSON OH WOE, you would hang up on her, right? *I* certainly would.
Also, Sophie Kinsella. Specifically, the Shopaholic series. I had friends who loved it, and when I tried to read it, I nearly had panic attacks at the heroine’s painful denial. The worst part was knowing she’d go on to do it again and again and again.
Oh, and for people who gave up on the Wheel of Time – the series is actually being wrapped up really nicely. Before Robert Jordan died, he asked Brandon Sanderson to finish the series, which he’s doing with a series of 3 final books. The first two of those have come out and been really, really good – as good as the first few books in the series. So good, in fact, that I’m now reading Sanderson’s Mistborn trilogy and liking it a lot…
Sorry if this post violates the premise of this thread! I just have been reading these books since the first one came out, which was over TWENTY YEARS AGO, and I am absurdly grateful that it’s going to have an ending, and the ending is going to be good. Even if that ending doesn’t explain to me why anyone would ever become a Darkfriend given that being one seems like a guarantee of a pretty miserable existence.
It is so nice to be in good company and to read so many great opinions, even about a book or two I may love. My list is a doozy so please be kind. I am tough to please when it comes to a series and these were all recommended to me and to be honest, none of them stuck. The only one that ever has was “Thursday Next”.
Nora Roberts – Queen of the Romance world. Don’t care if she is a nice lady, I am sure she is, but her In Death series made me so angry with all the repetition and horrible writing. I swear she has a mad libs template for that series on her computer. Eve was impossible for me to relate to since her hard ass attitude borders on narcissistic. Numerous times I wanted to hurl the book because of her bullshit.
Laurell K Hamilton. – Someone needs to get her a thesaurus and fast. One sentence used the word “gleaming” five times. Seriously??? Also, Anita Blake’s wardrobe was always described to the point I thought I was reading a catalog.
Janet Evanovich – Quite possibly she has written one of the most annoying, supposedly empowered female characters ever. Stephanie Plum falls under Too Stupid Too Live for me.
Twilight – read one page at random and could not believe people thought this was a well written romance. The blog Reasoning With Vampires highlights all the awful writing/editing which is pretty much almost every single written line.
I also loathe when 9 times out of 10 I pick up an erotica novel and dammit to hell, the woman is a virgin and the hero has a raging whore past. No matter if the hero is a shape shifter or Dom, somehow it is supposed to be more appealing to me as a grown woman that her virginity will be ripped away by some strapping buck named “Cole”.
Here is my “WFT is this crap” list
:
Gena Showalter – left the tstl heroine in The Darkest Night running in the woods and have not looked back.
Kresley Cole – actually read all of A Hunger Like No Other and then immediately wished I had spent that time cleaning instead
Iron Duke – I really, really wanted to like this one, liked the prequel novella, but Rhys annoyed the hell out of me and the “good rape”-scene mentioned earlier in this thread also really put me off. Struggled to finish this one and will not continue this series.
Julia Quinn – boooring
Maya Banks – returned Colter’s Wife to Amazon after a few pages
However, I loooove Outlander with a passion 😉
Oh, I forgot about hating Kelley Armstrong’s Bitten (always thought Chance would make a nice rug), and Kim Harrison’s Witch (worst heroine EVER). Thanks for the reminder!
Mine is Jennifer Crusie’s Bet Me. (or any Crusie, really, but this one specifically) Many of my blogger buddies love it so much, it inspired a reading challenge for me.
While I liked the main characters, I hated every other person in the book. So much that the thought of it just gives me the shudders.
This is very encouraging. Sometimes I wonder whether I am peculiar, of whether it is just being old and British, but clearly plenty of young Americans share some of my tastes. What a relief.
I once read a Sherrilyn Kenyon, which was so utterly, childishly silly that I couldn’t believe it had been published. Nora Roberts: I have read a lot of her books over the years, but never really warmed to them. Her sex scenes are always a bit creepy because they are somehow generic and impersonal, but worse than that (and probably the result of her immense output) is that her plots are sometimes extremely shaky. The worst example I know of is Birthright, which has so many plot holes, ridiculous characterisations and factual errors that, for me, the whole story simply unravels.
Linda Howard: I can cope with After the Night, though I can well understand those who find it unbearable, but some of her early categories are worse, notably The Cutting Edge and Sarah’s Child, and I strongly dislike her most recent books. Yet she has written some brilliant, unforgettable novels too.
Anything with vampires disgusts me (I have too literal and visual a mind), and most fantasy simply does not engage my interest; I get bored almost immediately. I once attempted to read Anne Bishop’s Midnight Jewels thing. Absolute tosh, and so boring.
🙂
Hm – They’re not really romances but I despise Gone With The Wind. Hated Anne Rice’s Belinda – she’s 16 for goodness sakes! This isn’t a romance. And the “hero” is a man who admits he likes seeking out sex from underaged girls and boys! He even seeks out underaged prostitutes for it! But he illustrates children’s books! YUCK!
Hated Catcher In The Rye and Old Man And The Sea too.
Oh God Wendy yes, i did not like hunger games. it was interesting and pretty well written but the ending! who wants to read a book that ends in PTSD! ugh it actuall gave me nightmares, to horrific and gruesome.
Twilight sucks. you all know why. so no discussion there.
Haha Sandra I LOOOOOOve Kelley Armstrong and don’t find it boring at all. how funny.
so glad everyone pointed out that Outlander is essentially about adultery. I wanted to read it, wanted to buy the fancy new edition. Now I know I shouldn’t.
RKB: well said! your respond to Kerry Allen was great. I despise Twiligth for at least 20 different reasons, but I still love my friends who love them. Because them are my friends, and people are more complex than their taste in a specific series.
when it comes to Sherrilyn Kenyon, some are great, some really suck. it can go either way, and often it’s the tiniest thing that ruins it for me, like the hero’s over use of a cliche. but the ones I love, I REALLY love.
I tried one of the BDB books, (I think it was BDB) and found it unoriginal and I didn’t really care about what would happen next. But worst of all? the CONSTANT use of the word “shit-kickers” as a replacement for boots. it was just sprinkled throught the book. It was like the author had NEVER heard the word boots. drove me nuts, stop trying so hard!
Kristi Lea: maybe you’ll like Kresley Cole’s books? you could argue that the canibalism aspect of vampirism is removed because all of the characters are essentially “monsters” so it’s sort of more animalistic? I don’t know how to explain it, but maybe it will work for you.
blech blech blech for something blue! HATED the heroine, what a moraless woman! and her disregard for her unborn child was just horrifying to me.
I really hated the Shopaholic series. Like, with a passion that is surprising, even for me. The first one was okay. Not great, but okay. The second one made me want to scream. Did this stupid nitwit not learn anything from the last book? And, why is this man putting up with her? Ugh. I hate them both. In fact, I had to get rid of all my Sophie Kinsella books after I read that one because now every time I read another one all I can think about is how angry the Shopaholic series made me. This is a totally out of proportion reaction to the terribleness of the books and yet I can’t stop myself.
Outlander- I like it for a few hundred pages, then I wanted to chuck it across the room for a hundred pages, and then I just wanted it to end. Meh. I would never read another of her books.
Not really romance but- The Pilot’s Wife. Just thinking about that story makes me feel sick to my stomach. Adultery makes me squeamish. Especially when one party is clearly so oblivious.
sorry, with regards to BDB it should read “it WASN’T just sprinkled throughout”
Oh, I’d forgotten about Nora Roberts – it’s been a while since I’ve tried to read anything by here. The POV jumping drives me crazy too – nice to know I’m not the only one. I also find them really… beige and lacking in internal conflict. The hero always falls for the heroine very early on and spends the rest of the book endeavouring to convince her of this.
Oh! Jamisings- I hated Gone With The Wind too! Scarlet was a horrific person. I didn’t give a damn long before Rhett.
@Cabell – Ah, but if you hung up on Anita Blake, it would be revealed later in the series that you had some hidden, horrible problems, like maybe you secretly were a kelptomaniac, kicked puppies for giggles, or were an uncontrollable liar. Even if you at no earlier point showed tendencies for these kinds of problems.
I used to love the Anita Blake books, but I have since dropped them with hardly a twinge (the twinge comes from having been invested in the series for years). I admit, I liked the large cast of gorgeous guys at first, but when Anita stared collecting them and hypocritically telling them they couldn’t be with other women (other men was more debatable, since it added to the list of men Anita could then have sex with). Richard went from being a nice guy to being a jerk, and, if I remember correctly, Ronnie developed a sex addiction (I think?) out of the blue. Argh.
Pride and Prejudice.
“Wow, Darcy’s house is nice. Suddenly, I love him.”
Yeah, awesome.
I am really not loving vampires as protagonists. I don’t find cold-bodied, blood-sucking parasites to be sexy. They are suxy. And that is not a good thing. This makes me rather “Meh” about a very popular trend in romance books.
After seeing all the hype about Lord of Scoundrels I decided to read it and was expecting the BEST BOOK EVAH, Y’ALL…WHOOOOO!!! Instead I got a run-of-the-mill romance with two characters who ended up mainly because he was a big bully who needed someone to set boundaries for him and she was a smarmy b*tch who needed someone to manage because she was already so perfect she had nothing else to do except shoot people. Meh.