Caption That Cover: Seven Miles of Chiffon

People were amazed that I didn’t have a word to say about Evangeline Collins’ cover. Of course I did. I have an entire entry’s worth of comments on that fluffy monstrosity of purple and fuchsia.

But I figured it would be MUCH more fun to challenge you to Caption That Cover – so it’s fun and games and contest time! Have a long, sweeping look at this cover:

Book Cover

Your job, should you choose to accept it, is to caption that cover Using Only One Word. I won’t even give you samples. I don’t want to take one away. Your best one-word caption could win you (a) a paper copy of the book and (b) a $25 gift certificate to the bookstore of your choosing. You have 24 hours to caption that cover – with Only One Word.

Standard disclaimers apply: I’m not being compensated for this giveaway, except to deny myself the pleasure of looking at the cover again and again so as to reassure myself that it is real. Slippery When Wet. No shirt, no shoes, no service. I believe I can call. I think I’ll use the phone in the hall. I’ll call my friends just to say ‘Hi’ with 5 cent Sundays from MCI. I believe I can call. Reach out and touch someone.

Categorized:

General Bitching...

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  1. Milena says:

    Fuchsination. I don’t know if made-up words count, but this one just blossomed fully-formed in my head like a purple Athena on seing the cover.

    spamword: inside88. Oh, no, I’m not going there.

  2. Cathy says:

    Does “Purple-people-eater” count as a single compound word?  🙂

  3. Jaye says:

    Susurrous!

  4. Jayne says:

    Textilphilia.

  5. jayhjay says:

    Organzasm

  6. Kristi says:

    Since it seems that non-OED words are being accepted:
    Fluffstrosity.

  7. Laura says:

    Purpliciousness

  8. Denise Doupnik says:

    How about spewliciousness?

  9. Miss Moppet says:

    I really like that cover, actually. Not entering the contest as I couldn’t possibly sum it up with one word, but here’s a haiku instead.

    Lavender satin
    Tastefully covers his butt?
    Not realistic.

    Also, why is the skin tone different on the two halves of his body?

    Still really like it though.

  10. Chris says:

    fandangauzm

    From the fuchsia-esque color fandango combined with gauze, and intended to imply orgasm.

  11. MichelleKCanada says:

    How about “Tool” heh heh

  12. Donna says:

    I have to agree with Miss M, I love this cover. In fact I picked the book up from the library and it’s on my nightstand as we speak. If I’d never heard of Evangeline Collins & happened across this in the book store, my hands would’ve snatched it up.  And the whole time my brain would’ve been coming up with words like luscious.

  13. Rene says:

    Lointulle

  14. kirshpgh says:

    Lavenderotic

  15. Barbara says:

    Climactitulle!

  16. Suzy says:

    Sari-licious!!

    All the purple material reminds me of an Indian sari unwound… which considering what’s ‘going on’ would make a lot of sense!!

  17. kathleen says:

    Gaseous.

  18. macbethslady says:

    “Chafe”

  19. Sarah W says:

    For my money (and it isn’t, so I can say what I like), jayjay’s already won it.

    But I’m not a quitter, so:

    Stainful

    Because all I could think about was how the housekeeper was going to wash all that stuff before drycleaning was invented.
    Where has my sense of romance gone?  Oh, right, the laundry room . . .

    hand74:  whose going to handwash all 74 yards of that purple stuff?

  20. PattiR says:

    ‘supercalafragalisticexpialadoshus’
    For the book cover that truly leaves one speechless.

    http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=supercalafragalisticexpialadoshus

  21. Castiron says:

    If I knew enough German to verify that this was a plausible compound, I’d say Lilakopfessenstoff.  Sadly, my German is near non-existent.

    So I’ll stick with “defabrication”.

  22. The Dressmaker’s Bolts of Lust

  23. Abbie says:

    Mauvulate? Does that color count as mauve?

    girl84 – How do they know what year I was born?

  24. Alex Ward says:

    Chiffonalicious?

  25. Rumplesilkskin

    @jayhjay love it!

  26. Kristen says:

    Fantasmagorical -as in: That cover is so fantasmagorical it makes my eyes hurt. 😉

    http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=fantasmagorical

  27. Michaelene says:

    thigh-high

    Hey, those are some pretty fantastic legs (if I do say so myself) so I can understand his fetish for lavender soft thighs….encased in an atrocious amount of purple sheets.  Now, I’m left wondering where the bed is….

  28. Jennifer Armintrout says:

    Dresszilla

  29. Crystal says:

    That cover looks like Bath and Body Works and Austin Scarlett had a child.

    As for the one word title: Suffocation.

    Because miles of candy colored chiffon never seemed less sexy.

  30. Kelly LM says:

    Manly.

    Real men wrap their lovers in miles upon miles of pinky purple vagina-esque fabric?

    full69 – best captcha evah!

  31. Tee says:

    Remenants (cause maybe that was left over fabric from a dress store?!!)

    De-mummied (did he just unwrap her from a casing of unshaped purple fabric?!!)

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