Romance Novel Product Line: The Winner!

Oh, my gosh, the entries in the Romance Novel Product Line are giving me Abs of Steel from the laughter workout. Holy smoke.

First, Short Librarian emailed me her image file, so enjoy this Honorable Mention entry for a moment while I organize the winners:

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Honorable Mention:  In addition to Man Candles, the honorable mentions for products inspired by Romance Novels go to:

Laura Xixi and Julie H for “Wanton Strumpet: Body Mist” – protect against harm derived from sex on impractical surfaces! BWAHAH!

Denise for ClothesOff! No more hopping on one foot to take off your sock? Excellent.

Morwen for InstaCare, which renders the brutish male all soft in good ways – with bonus DeFang, which adds… sparkles of course.

IcePrincess for ForeverSmooth – Regency Hair Removal.

Kaetrin for Brute 69 – what do you think it smells like??

Second Runner Up goes to Anna Richland, who offers up the Per-Kay, only for those saggy I’m-not-17-anymore feelings, and, The Super-Bladder 3000: “Because there’s something besides bad breath that compels you to roll away from your man in the morning.”

First Runner Up 2 is awarded to Sylbia Sybil, who came up with a whole selection of scents designed to create and sustain any and all Romance archetypes. Which is your fave? I’m partial to “Allure,” which “Puts the Magic in Magic Hoo-Ha.”

And our winner: PattiR for HEA Pill – guaranteed to line up every possible happy ending, including “Hot Monkey Sex, Love, and Commitment” with possible “finding out you are Rich, and having lots of Babies.” Well played!

PattiR, please email me at SarahATsmartbitchestrashybooksDOTcom with your bookstore of choice and I shall send out the gift card for book-type purchases. Congrats – and thank you for making this a freaking HILARIOUS thread!

Comments are Closed

  1. 1
    PattiR says:

    OMG!  I won!!  Thank you so much!  There were some hilarious entries; I had such a blast reading them all!

  2. 2
    Teri C says:

    This was a great contest. Hats off to you ladies who shared wit us the ideal romance products.

  3. 3
    Kaetrin says:

    Congratulations to the other ‘honourable mentions’, runner’s up and the winner!  What great company to have!  Thx Ladies.

  4. 4
    Kat Diamond says:

    I was on blog reading hiatus when this contest came out! Now I have to go back and read the entire thread.

    Love the pill’s “side effects.” Great idea!

  5. 5
    saltwaterknitter says:

    I didn’t have time to put one together, but if I had, I would have done something about red hair dye. I’ve heard enough guys talking about it to know that some of them really do have a thing for red haired women, but apparently romance authors do, as well. Way too many women in these books have red hair, as compared with the real percentage of women, imo.

  6. 6
    Tiffany sale says:

    please email me at SarahATsmartbitchestrashybooksDOTcom with your bookstore of choice and I shall send out the gift card for book-type purchases. Congrats – and thank you for making this a freaking HILARIOUS thread!

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