That’s right – you win nosehair! Just kidding.
While I wish I could give away legless levitation with glowing ass powers, alas, my powers are limited to a $25 gift certificate to the bookstore of the winner’s choosing for winning the Caption That Cover: Nosehair Edition contest, featuring one of the very worst covers I’ve seen in a long time.
Honorable mentions:
redcrow for “glittery anus”
Nadia for “In a world where their love is only limited by her supply of those little Tabasco packets you get at Chick-Fil-A, together they…Wait for Dusk!”
Castiron for “She’s a rare example of the Shining Rear Vampire.”
Natalie Hart for “She wanted to go down on him, but there didn’t seem to be any *there* there … perhaps … his nose was so large, and so hard … it was worth a shot.”
First runner up:
Linsalot for “He had narcolepsy, She had halitosis. They were never meant to be together, but fate intervened and one legless night in a cave was all it took to change thier lives forever.”
And the winner: Kathleen for:
She wanted a man who could find her tapeworm.
He wanted a woman who shone the sun out of her ass.
Together they embarked on a mission to find their legs … and found love instead.
Please email me at sarahATsmartbitchestrashybooksDOTcom with your bookstore choice. Congratulations!
You did pick a winner! That one is great!
I will now treasure the concept of nosehair forever.
Haha, those are all great. Congrats Kathleen!
But . . . what is that on his arm?! Is it supposed to be his shirt? ‘Cause it looks like a tentacle!
I’m behind. At least I’m not shining light out of it.
God, this is terrible. I can’t stop laughing at this cover. Who in their right mind said “This one. I like this one.” Did no one notice there were no legs? I guess they “downsized” all their people with actual talent and let Herb take a shot at it. You now Herb don’t you? He’s that creepy guy down in the mail room.
Cover designers ought to post their drafts on the office bulletin board as a final step. Someone would’ve been bound to notice the missing legs!
Thank you for the honorable mention—I am honored. Great winner!
I love glittery …. oops!