Ahoy from the Not Safe for Work department here at Bitchery HQ.
I’m not kidding about the Not Safe for Work Part. Please. Think of the children. And yourself.
From Melissa Marr, we have an amazing and dare I say brilliant link to what truly happens when you become Bejazzled. Bejazzling, if you’re not familiar, is when Swarovski crystals are applied to your waxed hey-nanner-nanner. Instead of a landing strip, for example, you have a sparkly strip.
Wouldn’t that… chafe, should someone engage in some action with her actual and literal glittery hoohah?
But then, nestled intimately alongside Melissa’s email came another email from Gry, who sent in this piece of Norwegian majesty: Ad for over-filled swimming trunks … sometimes there can be too much sausage.
Ok, that’s Gry’s translation from Norwegian, but if you look at the picture, you get… the picture. Here’s the rest of the article, translated:
The German sportswear store might have selected slightly larger size for the
One of the readers of the Swiss online news page Blick.ch discovered the potent ad picture in the web store of Sportcheck, a german sport equipment retailer.
One of the models is shown wearing a classical pair of swimming trunks from Adidas. But, as the reader discovered, the trunks were either too small, or the model had too much body. Alternatively, somone has screwed up rather badly while photoshopping.
(The picture has been removed from the web shop page)
Wow. Glitter and wang! In one entry! How do I cope?
With a contest, of course. These two are destined to meet, the bejazzling investigator and the overburdened swimsuit model. I’ve got a $25 gift certificate up for grabs (ha!) to the person who comes up with the best romance novel title for these two lovely people. The Overhung Swimsuit Model’s Glittery Virgin? Caught In His Swimtrunks by The Sparkle?
Comments close in 24 hours, and you’re more than welcome to pimp your favorite to try to sway my vote.