After over 130 comments that revealed the best that language has to offer, it’s time to pick the winner! I love comment threads for contests. Y’all are so funny and awesome.
Honorable mentions go to:
Glynis for “Nostalgie de la boue which means “yearning for the mud.” A slangy term in French that not only means an attraction to what is unworthy, crude, or degrading, but also implies that one thinks that the yearner should be above such things.” Sounds like a few backhanded comments about romance, non?
Ellen for ““Il y a un dragon dan mo lit. Je veux un moustiquere.” (There is a dragon in my bed. I want a mosquito net.)” Supremely handy!
Kate Davies for “My all-time favorite: Meine Eltern haben sich nach Asien abgesetzt! German for “My parents had to flee to Asia!” Applicable to a variety of situations, of course.” I’m sure!
Runner up for the contest is:
Patsy for the extremely useful: “Non sono una americana facile. I’m not an easy American.” Myself, I’m one of the chewy, somewhat tough ones.
And the winner is:
Sarah (who is not me) for teaching us some very useful Irish curses, including: “Go nithe an cat thu, is go nithe an diabhal an cat. —May the cat eat you, and may the cat be eaten by the devil.” OUCH. That’ll hurt.
Sarah, please email me at sarahATsmartbitchestrashybooksDOTcom with your mailing address. Congrats to the winner and thank you for entering the contest!
Aww, dammit, why didn’t I see that post? Here’s some utterly distinguished (lol, not) Quebec French:
M’as te donner une tape s’a yeule, mon osti de sans dessein!
Literally translated: I’ll hit you on the mouth, my Host without plans!
(hostie = Host, but since the h is an aspirated consonant and our swears are bastardised religious words…)
Contextually translated: I’ll kick your ass, you fucking idiot.
Man! I wish I’d seen it to! The best useless phrase I ever learned was in Spanish when I was touring the north. Apparently, unlike in North America, when you see neon light just off the highway it isn’t a gas station. They are brothels LOL So, my friend taught me (please excuse the spelling) ‘Donde esta el putyclub’ which means ‘Where is the Brothel?’ Talk about useful tourist information 🙂
The one phrase I know in Romanian is “Un esta privada?” meaning “Where is the toilet?”, though I think that might come in very handy if I ever find myself in Romania.