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One of the aspects of romance that some folks LOVE and some folks loathe is the emphasis on children upon children and pregnancy as part and parcel to the happy ever after. For some people, a romance novel isn’t complete without a baby, either in the plot, or in the future, or a secret in the plot to be revealed in the future. For others, babies in romance are distinctly not-romantic (especially when one is tired to the point of blindness from taking care of one at all hours of the night) or, in the case of those going through infertility treatments or facing the inability to conceive, terribly painful.
Reader C. has asked for romance recommendations that aren’t about babies, and may even involve infertility as part of the plot- preferably a known condition that isn’t magically healed with frequent and dedicated applications of the spooge of healing from the Wang of Mighty Lovin™.
I’m hoping for some book recommendations, but I am also fairly sure it’s
a lost cause. Also, I don’t want to start a shit storm.What I would really like to find are some romances (preferably historical,
but contemporary, sci-fi/fantasy, etc. are all fine, too) where the story
does not make the hero/heroine’s reproductive abilities an integral part of
the plot/HEA. I’d like to find something that either lets the two main
characters just ride off into their heaving, purple sunset with no mention
at all of children or pregnancy, or I’d like to find something where
infertility is a real issue that is dealt with and accepted and the HEA
comes anyway. By that, I don’t mean one of these books where half of our
happy couple “just knows” that they can’t have kids, but then everything
is made all better via the magical uterus/invincible spermians.I also don’t
want any books where the infertility is legit, but everything’s okey-dokey
by the HEA thanks to some conveniently-placed orphans.I understand that this whole issue can really set people off, but I’m not
trying to push anyone’s “kids vs. no kids” buttons. As someone who can’t
have children without divine intervention, I’d just like find a good
romance novel to read that didn’t hit me over the head with the, “you’re
not a REAL family until you have children” message. A lot of family trees
have branches that end in the words “no issue”. Those two words do not
automatically mean that there wasn’t some ragin’-hot lovin’ going on
anyway … I’m just hoping there are some books out there about it.
My first suggestion for C: Bet Me by Jennifer Crusie – not because infertility is a big issue, but because the heroine is very frank about the fact that she doesn’t want children. Sometimes it’s not the idea that children are a prerequisite, but the idea that electing not to have children is a valid and acceptable option that makes a romance refreshing – this one in particular is a great example.
So: which romances feature infertility in ways that you appreciated, and which books were not so wedded to the idea that a Happily Ever After cannot occur without babies?
Linnea Sinclair’s SF/romance don’t have any kids in the HEA – my favorite is “Games of Command”, but “The Accidental Goddess” is also pretty good.
Promised Land, by Connie Willis, is a good fantasy/sci fi/romance. If you liked the whole space-cowboyish frontier aspects of Firefly, try it. There are absolutely no babies in it, too, nor any mention of them. The hero does have to take care of his younger siblings, but that’s it.
I’ve definitely noticed that certain genres of romance have more/less emphasis on kids as a happy ending. Sci fi/fantasy? Not so much. Regency, yes, although the older regency romances (the little thin ones) don’t.
I’m glad this topic was brought up. I’m a single mom by choice (SMC), and have gotten grief from some quarters for choosing to have a child without a partner. But reactions to my choice are nothing compared to the hassle that married family and friends have received for choosing NOT to have children.
I find it ironic that my married sister and I have both been branded as “selfish” for making exactly the opposite decisions for what consistuted our own personal HEA. There should be space in both the real and fictional world for every women’s choices.
(As an aside, I’m looking with amusement to the forthcoming Hollywood movies that feature an SMC as the plot device for the romance. While I know SMCs who have married after starting a family on their own, I think pregnancy only works as a lure when you’re Heidi Klum 😉
If you’re looking for historical, I’ve just read two books by Anne Mallory (Masquerading the Marquess & The Viscount’s Wicked Ways) that both end well without focusing on family, and she doesn’t do the cheesy epilogue either with the family snapshot. The dialogue is quite witty and the plot moves quickly. If you’re looking for a spicy contemporary read, I’ve just finished Maya Banks “Sweet” series and each couple is happy to explore their relationship instead of creating the family unit.
In the light, fun mystery genre: try Elizabeth Peters’ Vicky Bliss series and the Jacqueline Kirby series (especially Die for Love, which takes place at a romance writers’ convention). If I remember correctly, these novels are more caper-type adventures, with light romantic banter between the principals and no babies in conclusion.
Kia said:
True, but the heroine’s first husband was an alcoholic and a drug addict, both of which affect male fertility, so this easily falls into the “it was actually husband’s fault but back then they always blamed the woman” category. In fact, Loretta Chase herself said she always imagined they would eventually have biological children but wanted to show that Esmond loved Leila for herself and that children weren’t necessary for the HEA.
I like children—a good thing since I have 3—but know that while they were necessary for my HEA they are not required for everyone else’s. One of my sisters has two and one is childless by choice. I think it’s perfectly fine for a romance to end at the wedding or some point where the question of will they or won’t they is left to the reader’s imagination.
Lavinia Kent’s A Talent for Sin has an infertile heroine.
It’s more a historical versus romance but in Lady of the Glen by Jennifer Roberson, the main female character has a miscarriage / stillbirth after a highly traumatic event which at least after I encountered IF, had a lot more in meaning. Not integral to the plot nor mentioned to a great length (still a good read) but just caught me.
An example of the Mighty Wang healing infertility: The Aurora Teagarden series (Charlaine Harris). I loved the series, and, as bizarre as it sounds, LOVED that Aurora was infertile, because she had (some of) the same issues as me (deformed uterus, infrequent ovulation). Doctors had told her the same thing as they’d told me – babies weren’t in her future. She married her husband, they were fine if occasionally sad about it, but life was for the most part happy. Like me! Then (SPOILERS) he dies. She bones her old boyfriend. And oh! Guess what happens in the last book?
*sigh*
Yeah.
As someone who is only planning on ever again boning her husband (who has a fairly mighty wang of his own), and who is never going to be able to have children, that ending was sort of a cop-out. I mean, I could handle the husband dying, and her getting back together with her old boyfriend (I liked him better). But the Magical Pregnancy? Eh.
True Confessions (contemporary) by Rachel Gibson has a heroine that can,t have children, but the hero has a kid from before.
A side note, I remember listening to a Sociology professor who discussed fertility in a historical context. He claimed that before Victorian times, due to malnutrition, most women did not have regular periods. And that changed, with better access to food, and then the link between sex and procreation of course became stronger. And this would be the reason for the more “repressed” view of sex during the Victorian period, compared to, for example, the Elizabethan era. And that view prevailed until the pill…
I think the book jamisings was referring to is Night Magic by Charlotte Vale Allen.
Katie said:
This sounds intriguing! Does anyone recognize this book?
I read one book, The Last Bride, which kinda deals with infertility… sorta… In the ever after part they have kids, but they are all adopted children. Which is slightly better than the magical fecundity of other romance books.
This was a great topic! Not something I could say I ever really thought about before, but yeah, the whole idea of babies in epilogues does bother me. Like, ok, our story is done, and instead of just saying “THE END” and let us imagine what their HEA might involve, you have to go out of the way to include a baby in an epilogue? Maybe the writer needed the wordcount, I dunno.
I much prefer that if pregnancy/children are going to be mentioned, it be as part of a plot tactic, to create conflict/resolution of some kind the characters have to deal with and overcome on their way TO the HEA, because if it were to happen IRL, it wouldn’t be as easy as many romances like to make it seem.
However, this idea has now germinated into something I think I am going to incorporate into my new story, I already have one character that is having to deal with a miscarriage, so I think the other is going to be dealing with infertility. Real challenges for real people, YAY!
Coming totally late to this but thank you Nonny for articulating what I’ve felt reading my favorite genre. Having every HEA include babies boils down to telling us that to be happy, as women, we MUST HAVE CHILDREN!
Women are human being first, not breeders. Let’s have some HEA’s that have babies in the future but let’s also have some that, oh, I don’t know, have us winning Nobel prizes and stuff like that, too.
I have to second Sherry Thomas’ Not Quite a Husband as one of the few non-breeding HEA’s out there.
Thought of another series with an infertile character: the Liam Campbell series by Dana Stabenow. She seems to have dropped the series rather than have it come to a natural end, but up to this point the woman Liam loves is infertile. Note that these are mysteries, not romance.
The hero of Barbara Samuel’s A Piece of Heaven is one of the best I’ve ever read (not to mention he is non-white, for those who are looking for a more diverse universe of H/H). The heroine has a daughter from her first marriage.
My captcha word is doing53—there are so many ways that can be taken, most of them not printable in a family newspaper.
How about Kinsale’s the Shadow and the Star?
Nadia: That sounds like it could be what I was talking about!
I own this one! It’s one of my favourites! To Touch the Sun by Barbara Leigh
I also just finished reading Cry for Passion by Robin Schone. It’s a historical set in Victorian England and one of the main plot points is that the heroine does not want to have children, ever. There also some interesting stuff about Victorian prophylactics.
If you’re up for fantasy, The Wood Wife by Terri Windling has a romance in it, a 40 year old protagonist and nary a human baby in sight – except for a secondary character who doesn’t feature much in the events.
Historical western by Rebecca Brandewyne, I think the title is “Outlaw Hearts”. Heroine is infertile due to pelvis being crushed in accident during Civil War. May not be what OP has in mind, as I vaguely recall there being children in the story, possibly orphans or relatives/children of hero. But heroine is definitely unable bear children.
I had to come back to this thread, having been just hit with an example of the single most offensive thing I have ever encountered in a romance: the hero/heroine coming *right out and saying* that their infertility problem was solved by Twu Luvvvv. Please, just kick infertile people even more in the teeth, why don’t you?
This particular book is The Courtship Dance by Candace Camp, but I’m sorry to say it is not the first time I’ve encountered it.