These days, anyone can be a baseball announcer. Except women. And I take exception to that. It’s time to storm the announcer’s booth – and we can start getting ready now. How? We can come up with our own home run signature phrase!
A what now?
Some of the best and funniest broadcasters had catchphrases (no pun intended) and signature lines when a home run is hit. Bob Uecker of the Minnesota Milwaukee Brewers: “Get up, Get outta here, Gone!” Harry Caray and Phil Rizzuto: “A home run! Holy cow!” Chris Berman from ESPN: “Back back back back back back…GONE!” Bob Prince, from the old-school days of the Pirates: “Kiss it goodbye!” See? Nothing to it.
So let’s get creative. Enter your parts o’ speech below, and come up with your own home run signature phrase. Practice it at little league. Use it in mixed groups of sports fans. Either you’ll look like you’re exceptionally knowledgeable, or people will ask to share what you’re smoking. Either way- fun for all!
And HELL YES there are prizes. I’ll pick five winners – and each winner will receive a paper copy of Jill Shalvis’ Double Play. I’m a sucker for Shalvis’ heroes, and I really enjoyed this one. The hero is an all-star pitcher who is forced to wonder if there might be something more to life than just baseball – and the heroine keeps distracting him when he needs to keep his focus around her.
So let’s play ball. You’ve got 24 hours. Batter up! Grab some pine!
Note: the results appear in a popup window, so be ye warned.
Holy tiger ! That sucker just spun the sex shop and it won’t stop spewing ‘til it reaches Turkey!!
Holy Hamsters ! That baseball just smoked the stratosphere and it won’t stop flaming ‘til it reaches Pango Pango!!
Holy alpaca ! That cupcake just skipped the parking lot and it won’t stop spanking ‘til it reaches Namibia!!
That was entirely too much fun!
Holy Hedgehog ! That Ball of Yarn just Dated the Trench and it won’t stop Dancing ‘til it reaches India!!
Holy African Wild Dog ! That baseball just hit the Tiger Stadium and it won’t stop running ‘til it reaches Canada !!
Holy armadillo ! That moon just rammed the garden and it won’t stop swinging ‘til it reaches Lichtenstein!!
Holy Zebra ! That lemonhead just pranced the cellar and it won’t stop churning ‘til it reaches Suriname!!
Woot!
Holy chinchilla! That super ball just shellacked the beach and it won’t stop punting ‘til it reaches Ireland!!
Good stoat almight! That tulip bulb just ran to Bismark and won’t stop remembering until it gets to England!
Holy sloth ! That blueberry just scooted the third-story window and it won’t stop skipping ‘til it reaches The Galapagos Islands!!
Holy anteater ! That frisbee just shot the left field and it won’t stop hitting ‘til it reaches Spain!!
Holy milking cow ! That cud just flew the barn and it won’t stop spewing ‘til it reaches Scotland!!
Holy panther ! That cantaloupe just pasted the Minneapolis and it won’t stop tickling ‘til it reaches Andorra!!
Hmm. My verification word (what97) really summarizes how I feel about my homerun phrase!
Holy platypus ! That wheel just swung the zoo and it won’t stop rolling ‘til it reaches Switzerland!!
Holy ferret ! That watermelon just yoinked the campus and it won’t stop squeezing ‘til it reaches Belgium!!
Holy horse ! That apple just flung the toilet and it won’t stop swinging ‘til it reaches Australia!!
Ha! Explain THAT to my officemates as I giggle like a loon 🙂
Smart Bitches Technology: Your Homerun Signature Phrase!
Holy rabbitt ! That ball just kissed the Pizza Hut and it won’t stop running ‘til it reaches France!!
Holy puppies ! That lollipop just kissed the river and it won’t stop sailing ‘til it reaches Canada!!
Holy Badger ! That Orange just Kicked the Bar and it won’t stop Misting ‘til it reaches London!!
Holy prarie dog ! That cherry just spread the home and it won’t stop daring ‘til it reaches Oman!!
Holy coyote ! That globoid just glommed the bleachers and it won’t stop jaunting ‘til it reaches Guatemala!!
Holy sea gull ! That kumquat just hammered the detention hall and it won’t stop whopping ‘til it reaches Uzbekistan!!
I like the concept of a “holy sea gull.” I imagine a group of nuns at the beach tossing communion wafers to them.
Holy lemur ! That goldfish bowl just ate the Olympus Mons and it won’t stop bemoaning ‘til it reaches abroad!!
Holy ferrets! That moon just smelled the left field and it won’t stop whizzing ‘til it reaches Canada!!
OUCH.
Holy monkey ! That circular saw blade just mounted the nunnery and it won’t stop ejaculating ‘til it reaches kazakhstan!!
I love these!!
Holy Beaver ! That Sphere just jumped the London and it won’t stop running ‘til it reaches Russia!!
Holy Koala ! That ass just stumbled the home and it won’t stop swinging ‘til it reaches France!!
Holy fish ! That penny just stole the sky and it won’t stop spazzing ‘til it reaches France!!
Holy monkey ! That ball just sought the library and it won’t stop kissing ‘til it reaches Italy!!
Holy Jackrabbit ! That melon just pumped the heaven and it won’t stop freaking ‘til it reaches afghanistan!!
Holy beaver ! That snow ball just blasted the desert and it won’t stop smoking ‘til it reaches Canada!!
Holy ostrich ! That gumball just jumped the carwash and it won’t stop spinning ‘til it reaches Sri Lanka!!
Holy Bull ! That ball just hammered the no man’s land and it won’t stop flying ‘til it reaches Siberia!!
Holy hog ! That apple just flayed the tower and it won’t stop throbbing ‘til it reaches Japan!!
I am so absolutely horrible when it comes to using my imagination. I just spent 15 minutes trying to think up possibly funny things…. *sigh* LOL
Holy spider monkey ! That marble just fluttered the Zanzinbar and it won’t stop pulsating ‘til it reaches Finland!!
Holy gopher ! That meatball just whizzed the truckstop and it won’t stop loping ‘til it reaches Denmark!!
Holy Emu ! That cantaloupe just waited the port-a-potty and it won’t stop crossing ‘til it reaches Portugal!!
Holy salamander ! That orange just splattered the bedroom and it won’t stop spurting ‘til it reaches Constantinople!!
Holy Woodchuck ! That grapefruit just skidded the cathedral and it won’t stop sailing ‘til it reaches Bermuda!!
Holy humming bird! That cookie just smoked the Magic kingdom, and it won’t stop tinkling ‘til it reaches the Dominican Republic!