These days, anyone can be a baseball announcer. Except women. And I take exception to that. It’s time to storm the announcer’s booth – and we can start getting ready now. How? We can come up with our own home run signature phrase!
A what now?
Some of the best and funniest broadcasters had catchphrases (no pun intended) and signature lines when a home run is hit. Bob Uecker of the Minnesota Milwaukee Brewers: “Get up, Get outta here, Gone!” Harry Caray and Phil Rizzuto: “A home run! Holy cow!” Chris Berman from ESPN: “Back back back back back back…GONE!” Bob Prince, from the old-school days of the Pirates: “Kiss it goodbye!” See? Nothing to it.
So let’s get creative. Enter your parts o’ speech below, and come up with your own home run signature phrase. Practice it at little league. Use it in mixed groups of sports fans. Either you’ll look like you’re exceptionally knowledgeable, or people will ask to share what you’re smoking. Either way- fun for all!
And HELL YES there are prizes. I’ll pick five winners – and each winner will receive a paper copy of Jill Shalvis’ Double Play. I’m a sucker for Shalvis’ heroes, and I really enjoyed this one. The hero is an all-star pitcher who is forced to wonder if there might be something more to life than just baseball – and the heroine keeps distracting him when he needs to keep his focus around her.
So let’s play ball. You’ve got 24 hours. Batter up! Grab some pine!
Note: the results appear in a popup window, so be ye warned.
Ooh me first!
Holy squirrel ! That glass eye just ejaculated the Carthage and it won’t stop smarting ‘til it reaches Vatican City!!
Hurrah! More BitchLibs!
Holy Beaver ! That target just foamed the kitchen and it won’t stop tripping ‘til it reaches Costa Rica!!
Holy Egret ! That doughnut just tripped the basement and it won’t stop expecting ‘til it reaches Zimbabwe!!
Holy poodle ! That marble just fondled the bedroom and it won’t stop riding ‘til it reaches Italy!!
Holy Marmoset ! That meatball just stole the spare room and it won’t stop frenching ‘til it reaches Uruguay!!
Holy horse ! That ball just swacked the kingdom and it won’t stop swiving ‘til it reaches France!!
Holy manatee ! That tangerine just nuzzled the beach and it won’t stop shuffling ‘til it reaches Ireland!!
Holy elephant! That meatball just smoked Fifth Avenue and it won’t stop spinning until it flips Zimbabwe.
Andieg, wonder how many of us picked Zimbabwe?
I love the NYY announcer who says “see ya!” I use that all the time.
Holy monkey ! That hula hoop just spanked the Disney World and it won’t stop riding ‘til it reaches Swaziland!!
ROFLMFAO
Holy emu ! That sphere just caned the Opera House and it won’t stop flying ‘til it reaches Peru!!
Holy dolphin ! That bubble just wasted the sea-side and it won’t stop grinning ‘til it reaches Antarctica!!
(It sounds like something 1970’s Boy Wonder would say to Batman – kaPOW!)
Hee!
Holy llama ! That plastic lid just tuned the Iqaluit, Nunavut and it won’t stop undulating ‘til it reaches Nigeria!!
Holy skunk! That pinball just fired the castle and it won’t stop swallowing ‘til it reaches Australia!!
Holy crow ! That canteloupe just smashed the Starbucks and it won’t stop crying ‘til it reaches Moracco!!
Holy tiger ! That sphere just barked the park and it won’t stop going ‘til it reaches Botswana!!
Holy Raccoon ! That superball just happened the factory and it won’t stop thinking ‘til it reaches Kuala Lumpur!!
We miss Harry Kalas of the Phillies – It’s outta heeerrreee!!!
Holy Sloth ! That doughnut just squandered the Shangrila and it won’t stop coining ‘til it reaches The Greater Antilles!! }:)
Holy cheetah ! That pearl just spanked the dorm room and it won’t stop gelling ‘til it reaches Nepal!!
Holy wombat ! That kiwi just dug the mountain top and it won’t stop bitching ‘til it reaches New Zealand!!
Holy hamster ! That breast just flashed the music hall and it won’t stop bouncing ‘til it reaches Russia!!
Holy octopus ! That sphere just lathed the library and it won’t stop paving ‘til it reaches Myanmar!!
Holy marmot ! That plum just spanked the library and it won’t stop staggering ‘til it reaches Wales!!
Holy Gerbil ! That tire just sweated the Sesame Street and it won’t stop jiggling ‘til it reaches Timbuktu!!
Smart Bitches Technology: Your Homerun Signature Phrase!
Holy chipmunk ! That cantalope just copulated the caboose and it won’t stop cartwheeling ‘til it reaches Christmas Island!!
I do love me some baseball and Jill Shalvis’s DOUBLE PLAY takes the boys of summer to a whole new place!
Holy black footed ferret ! That musk melon just recovered the the badlands and it won’t stop spelunking ‘til it reaches Canada!!
Holy Marsupial ! That kumquat just swung the Timbuktu and it won’t stop snarkin ‘til it reaches Belguim!!
Holy Ostrich ! That globe just whacked the Minneapolis and it won’t stop flying ‘til it reaches Djibouti!!
I tried to be spontaneous, but Djibouti is necessary.
Holy lemur ! That apple just licked the bookstore and it won’t stop joking ‘til it reaches Norway!!
These are so much fun!
Holy hippopotamus ! That potpourri globe just enervated behind the barn and it won’t stop chewing ‘til it reaches the Principality of Liechtenstein!!
Holy dachshund ! That frisbee just plopped the Amish Country and it won’t stop smooching ‘til it reaches Ireland!!
Holy armadillo ! That orange just bounced the broom closet and it won’t stop sweating ‘til it reaches Egypt!!
This round of libs has yet more fruit! 😉
Hee!
Holy bushbaby ! That acorn just squawked the bedroom and it won’t stop belching ‘til it reaches Egypt!!
Holy cheetah ! That melon just thwacked the detroit and it won’t stop crackling ‘til it reaches iceland!!
Holy bosoms! That musketball just screamed the into orbit and it won’t stop thrilling ‘til it reaches Pluto!!
Holy chicken ! That water balloon just skittered the Mars and it won’t stop ralphing ‘til it reaches Poland!!
Holy llama ! That dinner plate just swept the Nipawin and it won’t stop running ‘til it reaches Canada!!
Holy llama ! That stressball just went the school and it won’t stop hitting ‘til it reaches Liechtenstien!!
Just so you know…the Brewers are from Milwaukee, not MN…we’ve got the Twinks.
Holy camel ! That poison sphere just leaked the Hell and it won’t stop killing ‘til it reaches Italy!!
Holy skunk ! That sun just washed the Bolinas and it won’t stop lurching ‘til it reaches Romania!!
Also, The San Francisco Giants had a woman announcer for a while.