Time for my favorite game – Caption That Cover. Below, a work of majestic cover art. Give it a caption – LOL or otherwise, and leave it in the comments. Best one judged by your votes and me gets a $20 gift certificate to Amazon or the bookstore of your choice. Comments close in 24 hours.
Enjoy!
Um, I don’t mind rescuing you, but could you do something with your bittersweet promises. You’re just not that nom.
Come ON… let the poor dolphin up for air now! Stupid water parks and their animal shows…
Water-skiing, ur doin’ it… pretty well, akshully.
At only 4’8’‘, Bob didn’t think he would ever find love with the tall, blonde woman of his fantasies. Then one day out at the lake trying out his new rod, he catches the big one.
Man these are already really good, dang it!
Her: “No really, darling, if you hold on to me you can walk on water too. Trust me.”
She laughed as he fell under for the third time this week. That just never got old.
Him reading her breast: “Made in China?”
“Look, babe, will you stop hanging on me! I really gotta pee and I’ve heard there’s candiru in this lake!”
Divinity: ur doin it rite.
He’s actually closing his eyes in pain.
5 seconds later:
Him: Baby, I’m going to fall!
Her: But your rippling arm mucles-
Him: Aren’t meant to hold people at physically improbable positions
Her: Oh please, you’ll be fine
Him: THIS IS AGAINST THE LAWS OF PHYSICS
Her: What are yo- ARRGGHH
Him: ARRRGGHH
*SPLASH*
INVISIBLE SANDBAR
I’m in ur lake, ogling ur rack.
His stature was small, but his dick was tall!
It was soon apparent that President Obama’s stimulus package would have unintended consequences.
Just 10 more curls and I’ll put you down – I promise! No, no – don’t open your eyes – The Charles Atlas book said we had to keep them closed!
King Arthur got the sword – I got the lady. I win.
Katrina thought she had her disguise perfect—flowing blonde locks, half-opened nightie—but she couldn’t seem to remember that humans don’t tail-walk.
DOLPHIN IN DISGUISE! As a DAMSEL! In some sort of DISTRESS!
“Oh, right, *that’s* where I stored the key to the boat”
“Honey,if you want to give me mouth to mouth,you need to look up HERE!”
or
Wild Water Wedgie in 3-D Action!
“Who would come quicker?” mused Pilar. “Trent or the squall?” She looked down her beloved, whose eyes were closed, a serene expression on his face. “The squall,” she muttered. Trent’s narcolepsy always kicked in at the most inconvenient times…
Him: “But I’m allergic to melon.”
He knew that when he fell in love with a Mafia informant, he was in deep trouble. But Officer Dirk Diggler didn’t care—he only saw the beauty that lurked behind the blue eyes (and the stressed laces of her bodice). When he heard that Jimmy “Fingers” Swaggert had fitted her with cement shoes, he knew that his heart would not be whole unless he saved her. His bilateral inguinal hernias could not hold him back from the promise of true love.
My favorites (other than my own, of course, especially since I HAVE dated shorter men):
Elizabeth Wadsworth with:
They thought they had the pairs ice dancing championship wrapped up, but global warming had other ideas…
or Kelli’s:
Much like the caber toss, the Buxom Blonde Toss is sure to thrill crowds at this year’s Highland Games.
Too hard to choose!
Jessie was tired of boring men and even more boring relationships. She wanted adventure, but she was resigned to the fact that she might die a bored virgin.
Until she met Jake, the widowed ex-SEAL that moved in next door. He taught her about passion, excitement, and…
…ice dancing in July.
Memories! Just like when my nanny taught me how to, umm, swim holding on to her, umm, water wings.
It was the first time in his life he was happy with his four feet eight of heigth.
Seconds before he fell onto her, crushing her underwater and ruining her hair, she thought to herself “Maybe wearing my eighteen inch platforms for a wade in the water WASN’T such a good idea. I thought it would keep my dress dry so when we danced under the moonlight it would swirl around, like my hair!”
I have to give a shout-out to Elizabeth Wadsworth’s “ice dancing” one, which made me LOL
Sure, Preacher Brawndo’s strip mall church services weren’t much, but the baptisms!
Johnny: I know I said that I’ve had the time of my life, but Baby, come on! This is getting ridiculous!
Baby: Suck it up, Johnny! I disappointed my father, not to mention I gave up on the Peace Corp and college for you, so the least you can do is make it like the first time we danced!
Johnny: But, wouldn’t you prefer being in bed to being in the water?
This and more in Dirty Dancing 2: After the Dance! Coming to a theater near you!
Um, this isn’t what I meant by “get me wet.”
Would Bart’s obsession with Daryl Hannah movies finally be his undoing? Three indictments for attempted murder would suggest yes.
Just a little more of that mousse, darlin’, and we’ll be able to FLY!
Charity Hopewell, unsung heroine, pioneer inventor of multi-tasking.
As a direct result of limited hours of daylight, unlimited amount of chores, and her husband, Travis’, strong appetites and constant attention, she became adept at the act of undertaking more than one task at one time.
Her successes include: Laundry/Bathing/Boinking, and Plowing Fields/Planting/Boinking, and Feeding Livestock/Gathering Eggs/Boinking.
“Odor? Why no, it’s not gas, darling, blowing on my tits just goes straight through me. I’m simply in orbit.”
Finally, Mitzi’s three successive wins in the Miss Wet T-Shirt of Lake County Pageant and Hog Tie Contest would be put to good use!
*Oh man I love this game
“Suck ‘em. I said, suck ‘em, dammit. Don’t make me drown your ass!”
this wasn’t what she had in mind when he said he wanted to get her wet.
His promise to teach her to swim was bittersweet, because she was too scared to let go.
“UNNGHHHHGHGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!”
“Weeeeeee-eeeee! Again, again, again!”
Anna gushed with desire…
or
“Gotta go, gotta go, gotta go right now.” (Do YOU have have over-active bladder disease?)
1. She’s having the time of her life.
2. Nobody puts Shanna in the corner
Thank God we took those dolphin training lessons at Sea World!
“I’m in the lake, saving ur life.”