Writer Sailor Jim has reprinted his essay on describing the erection, from his 2002 book Naked Through the Snow and Other Bits of Silliness. Hark! Throbbing, turgid, rigid, engorged humor on the sultry rod of manflesh!
Let us rejoice.
Lately, I think I’ve read more uses of the word “cock” than any other euphemism, and have even bumped into “erection” more often than I expect. Um,not literally. My house is not filled with turgid man staffs, though now that I think about it, that’s a solid decorating idea if I’ve ever heard one.
What methods of describing the erect penis have you read, or written, recently?
[Thanks to Shannon for the link.]
Somebody upthread posted “getting his wick dipped.” I read that as an accidental word inversion and he was actually “getting his dick whipped.” Kind of works either way.
Actually she suggests ‘turgid’ as she comes into the room, then ‘quivering member’ as she leaves (big, big geek about this). For these and many more reasons, I’ve never been able to use either term unless my characters are joking.
It’s not easy to find words that aren’t either trite, anatomically unsexy, or just ridiculous, and I personally find it even harder when describing a woman than a man. Perhaps because women haven’t really evolved a culture of talking about themselves that way, so all the terms available are either too clinical (vagina), or vaguely misogynistic (cunt).
Whereas men have evolved more colloquialisms—which I agree, sound better from a male POV than a woman’s. However, many are used as insults—dick, cunt—which makes them less desirable in sex scenes, IMO.
I tend to use cock mostly, sometimes penis although I don’t really like it, and dick mostly from his POV. And I’ve started to use erection, too, and on occasion hardness. They sound a bit euphemistic, but when writing erotic romance you risk ending up with the same word in every other sentence: variety is occasionally needed!
I’ve never had much editorial comment over my use of male terms, but I was asked to
No, I remembered wrong, she suggests ‘tumescent’ as she comes in. Like a big, sexy tumour. Mmm.
And I evidently hit ‘send’ before I finished my first post. In my defence, I haven’t had nearly enough coffee yet, and there is a kitten on my lap kneading holes in my arm, which does make typing difficult.
I’ve never had much editorial comment over my use of male terms, but I was asked to remove some uses of ‘cunt’ when I first started out at Changeling Press. My Ellora’s Cave editor didn’t seem to mind it, although I did use it more sparingly.
That really is it from me for now.
Probably.
The Signifigant Other occasionally uses Willie the One-Eyed Wonder Worm, but that’s a bit wordy for a novel. Maybe it could be shortened to WOW!
Cat, are you British? If so, I am surprised you find yourself able to use it. The associative baggage attached to that word, in spite of many noble feminist attempts to reinstate it, is so extreme that it would be a real stumbling-block for many readers. Of course sexual terminology is widely used in a pejorative way, but ‘cunt’ is the most savagely misogynistic word in English, or at least, in my dialect of English.
I’m not a writer, but am a voracious reader, and I’ve noticed “cock” a lot more frequently, even in some historicals, for which I am personally glad. In my own home use, MrSpell and I use cock and pussy as our preferred getting-it-on terms, so those words are most appealing to me as a reader…when I see overly flowery, overly clinical or over-the-top terms it takes me right out of the story. But I have to say that the same holds true for descriptions of the female anatomy – “humid love garden” makes me think of breeding grounds for yeast infections, compost and fertilizer, none of which really get me into the mood for the sexins.
As an aside, MrSpell loves to give me the giggles with creative names for his dangly bits (or turgid bits, as the case may be). The latest is Man Wand, because it makes the magic happen. Ye gods I love that man! If anyone wants to use that in a WIP, feel free, but give a hattip to MrSpell – I’d hate for his creativity to go unrewarded!
“torch of civilization”
Hubby says to add Cockness Monster. Yep, that’s my man!
“It was unwise to mock the phallus.”
I swear to whatever you believe or don’t believe in, I saw that line in an excerpt from some fantasy novel online. Needless to say, once I got done snorting my coffee out my nose, I decided not to buy that book and have never been able to see the word “phallus” anywhere without giggling. So books that use it generally don’t get taken seriously by me. Now, I find that “shaft” is probably safest for me, because then I can paint my own mental picture about what it looks like, without any social coloring.
As in, “Dick” seems like too much of a personality description, “penis” seems too cold, yadda, yadda. But “shaft” is fairly neutral.
I’m a fan of velvet shaft.
It’s not the name of the tool—it’s what you DO with it that counts, really. 😉
Oh, God, this thread is giving me traumatic flashbacks to bad slash stories.
Okay.
straining member
turgid meat
straining dick
rigid member
tumescent dick
massive member slick with Lance’s insides
hard shaft
rigid shaft
enormous erection
mammoth dick
turgid shaft
raging erection
engorged shaft
bloated cock
massive dick
pulsing member
turgid organ
aching member
twin towers of terror
These are all from one story.
Oh, and I just remembered, one of my pirates refered to his equipment as “King Neptune”.
Pirates aren’t known for being modest and retiring.[g]
I am astonished; despite the long lists upthread, nobody’s duplicated the coinage I found some while back in an Annette Blair romance (Sex and the Psychic Witch):
“man-brain”
I’m also mildly startled to discover that this crowd doesn’t seem to have reviewed any of Ms. Blair’s works; based on my experience with SatSW, I suspect you’d have a lot of fun with her, one way or another. The above-mentioned title was an . . . interesting read; I almost gave up on it about two-thirds of the way in, but Blair pulled a plot twist out of her hat at exactly the moment I was about to bail, forced me to keep going, and if she didn’t quite totally redeem herself, she impressed me with her ability to successfully shift gears and make the tonal change stick.
One of my gay friends maintains that “dick” is what straight men say; “cock” is more a gay word. So I’m wondering if there’s anything significant in its recent prevalence.
That’s an interesting observation, and it simply emphasises the subtle dialectical differences that can cause some readers to stumble over a word that others find normal. In British English – of my generation at least – ‘cock’ is far more common than ‘dick’ (I think of the latter not as a heterosexual term, but as an American one).
Huh. This does not correspond to my experience, such as it is. FWIW, my sense is that “dick” is much more common in spoken conversation among men in general, whereas “cock” is much more common than “dick” in written form, though there are a couple of exceptions to the latter. In written material by male authors, I’d identify two specific cases where “dick” is more common than “cock”: where the writers (or their characters) are of college age or younger, and where the writers (or their characters) are of the “redneck” rural personality type. Otherwise, “cock” (or “shaft” or sometimes “rod”) predominates.
Oh, yeah. I read that one about the “sword”.
I also read one that used “his flaming sword of desire”, kkk. I don’t remember the name of the book right now and it was written in portuguese, so my guess is that maybe, the translator got a little shy, at least thats how I like to think about it.
The “flaming sword” is cause for jokes until this day though.