Caption This Cover: Category Edition

JebB dove into the user book store, and came up with a cover so excellent, she immediately sent it to me with the request that we caption this bad boy.

I dunno, really. There aren’t any decent puns that are at all obvious in the art.

As usual, vote for your fave, and I’ll use my paper and pencil to count up the votes and award $20 in gifty dollars to the winner. Ready set go!

image

Categorized:

General Bitching...

Comments are Closed

  1. JenTurner says:

    The overly tanned man cast a devious look back at his soon-to-be lover’s house.  “Sabrina won’t have a choice but to talk to me now.”

  2. Deb Kinnard says:

    Cat to vet: “Well, it started with a lump on my hind paw…”

  3. MamaNice says:

    I vote for MFreeman…that was some funny.

    Psychopath hero with talking invisible cat = win!
    All he needs is a monkey in the closet.

  4. Elizabeth Wadsworth says:

    “With a hiss of disgust, Lucy realized that the plump rodent she’d just pounced upon was in fact Mickey MacFinn, billionaire were-mouse and trailer park entrepreneur with a tale to tell.”

    “What’s new, Pussycat?”

  5. Cate says:

    Jesus! When my girlfriend said if I’d feed the cat, she’d make claw marks on my back, this isn’t what I had in mind.

  6. Elizabeth Wadsworth says:

    Don’t have a caption for this, but I need to rant that it’s impossible for a cat to be standing on that man’s back without freaking out and grabbing the shirt with its mighty claws. Have tried with five cats, different sizes and have the scratches to prove it.

    Actually, my cat, who looks amazingly like the one on the cover, does this to me all the time.  Especially when I’m gardening.

  7. Gail says:

    The Human is MINE.

  8. Suz, Lizzie (can hardly wait for that new Silhouette line to hit the shelves!) and Lucidscreamer all have my vote. Er, welcome to menage… (snork!)

    Actually, these ALL had me laughing – hard to choose just one… er, three.

    reached25 – yes, some time ago.  🙂

  9. Pat says:

    “Hey, pussy, I’ve got something here for you in my jeans.”

    It was the placement of his hand that looks like its reaching around his side that made me do it.  I swear.

  10. Gemma says:

    How about “Under the Cat’s Paw” [historical-speak for “Pussywhipped”]

  11. Kathleen says:

    “He was so hot he’d get pussy thrown at him from cars.”

  12. Marguerite says:

    Got two more, equally tasteless:

    Although the operation gave him the pussy he’d always wanted, the physician put it in the wrong place.

    OR

    If a woman is defined by her pussy, does it matter if the surgeon placed it incorrectly?

  13. Chrocs says:

    Actually, my cat, who looks amazingly like the one on the cover, does this to me all the time.  Especially when I’m gardening.

    Damn! I know I should have tried a black cat, orange and gray are just not the same. Or maybe my cats are neurotic.

  14. Silver James says:

    I vote in no particular order:

    Karen:

    Cat on a hot tan man.

    katiebabs:

    Black Magic Virgin Pussy and the Greek Tycoon Who Loved Her

    Suze:

    The Incongruously Blond Italian Billionaire’s Familiar Mistress

  15. Vera says:

    1) Wizarding 101 – Be VERY specific in what you wish for

    2) The billionaire cat’s Butler

    3) Putting a black cat on your back does NOT mitigate the bad luck you got while S***ing the mistress under the garden ladder

    4) Wizards be ware – A Cat Familiar does not work the same as a familiar cat.

    5) Authors – please make sure that your publisher does not us pictures fro the LolCat site for book cover options.

    6) “Black Passion” sensation prickling up your spine – does not include cats.

  16. Melissandre says:

    I vote for Karmyn’s first, and for Amy.  Here are my humble contributions.

    “Roemanse novle covr: ur doin it rong”

    “What is the love that dare not speak its name?”

  17. Stacy Leibowitz says:

    Mr. Tinkles and the Man Titty Litter?

  18. jude says:

    Voting for Lizzie’s new Silhouette series.  Priceless!

  19. Tina M. says:

    I like:

    Jesus! When my girlfriend said if I’d feed the cat, she’d make claw marks on my back, this isn’t what I had in mind. (Cate)

    and

    “Hey, pussy, I’ve got something here for you in my jeans.” (Pat)

    and

    ‘This wasn’t what he had in mind when Mrs. Slocumbe offered him her pussy.’  (Karmyn)  BTW I love that show!

  20. Leslie H says:

    Basement cat lured him with offers of massage and unlimited pussy.

  21. Chloe says:

    I would just have to pick…
    Deb Kinnard with Cat to vet: “Well, it started with a lump on my hind paw…”
    But I also love Karmyn’s ‘This wasn’t what he had in mind when Mrs. Slocumbe offered him her pussy.’  I’ve always loved the pussy jokes on Are You Being Served?

  22. Stephanie says:

    “Yes, yes, do my bidding, weird loner man! Worm your way into the hearts of the family McCormick… make them pay for not splurging for Fancy Feast! There’s hair gel and David Hasselhoff records in it for you, this I promise.”

  23. While just about every one of these made me laugh, this one made me laugh the hardest:

    After completing the jail sentence incurred during the drunken-driving incident that saw both the revocation of his driver’s license and the demise of the talking car, Michael Knight was forced to find companionship with a different kind of KITT

  24. Karmyn says:

    One more from me.

    ‘Roger quickly learned that ‘Would you like to see my pussy?’ was not such a great pick up line.

  25. J.C. Wilder says:

    Quasimoto gets a date…

    Could be possibly be just a little more hunched over?

    Spam word: truth74 – AMEN!

  26. Lori says:

    That cat is looking seriously scary.

    “What you lookin’ at bitch?”

    (And heh heh to Welcome to menage kitten)

  27. talpianna says:

    There’s a lovely (but long out of print) novel called OPHELIA by Florence Stevenson.  It’s a contemporary in which a rich old lady leaves her fortune to her cat.  Her wicked nephew drops poor Ophelia down a well; her last thought is “I wish I were human; I’d get even with you!”  And it happens to be a wishing well…

    The old lady’s handsome son shows up to snaffle the inheritance, and is surprised to find a lovely naked lady in the well.  A naked lady who can’t talk, walks on all fours, and drinks by lapping from a bowl.  He teaches her to be human; they fall in love; and the dastardly nephew gets what he deserves.

    http://tinyurl.com/4txmek

    As for the caption—“Lucy couldn’t wait to get her claws into this guy—he was the cat’s meow!”

  28. MoJo says:

    Oh, shit.  It’s not even a pussy.  It’s a tom.

  29. wolfekelly says:

    “Okay Genie, very funny.  You know I meant the other kind of pussy… and can we re-open the discussion about the eight-inch pianist as well?”

    Elf – you made me LOL with this one.  Thanks for that.

  30. ashley says:

    a man’s best friend is his pussy.

    OR

    Lucy knew he had mad skills when she saw how well he could balance a cat on his back while walking and not looking where he was going.

  31. rebyj says:

    my vote:

    Karen:

    Cat on a hot tan man.

  32. Suze says:

    Fuck a duck, baby, feline lovin’ is the cat’s ass!  Oh gods, stop me, please.

    I vote for (in no particular order)

    Kathleen:

    “He was so hot he’d get pussy thrown at him from cars.”

    Galadriel:

    “It wasn’t until Lucy showed him her pussy that he realized just how much of a dog man he was.”

    And now I can’t find it because it’s past my bedtime, but the reference to Mrs. Slocumbe.  “Take a peek through the mail slot, and if you can see my pussy, slip a sardine under the door!”  (doubtlessly misquoted, but that was the gist)

  33. Rebecca says:

    Totally off-topic but….have any of the New Yorkers here seen the guy who walks up and down Broadway with a cat on his head?  He wears a baseball cap, backwards, and balanced on the baseball cap is a medium-sized black and white cat, on a leash, that sits on his head Egyptian style.  That’s what the cover made me think of.

    Back on topic: I vote for Cat on a Hot Tan Man

  34. eaeaea says:

    Perrrrrrfect Pussy Handler

  35. jessica says:

    “im on ur menz
    replacin ur pussy”

  36. JenTurner says:

    “im on ur menz
    replacin ur pussy”

    Holy shit!  I totally ruined my screen laughing at that one. LOL!

  37. Wilma Howe-Bennett says:

    hehehehehe

    h’mmmm . . .  how about “Feline Faves: Don’t NOBODY move or the shoulder is GROUND MEAT!”

  38. Lisa says:

    [with apologies to Queen of Wands, the entire Latin language and Disney)

    *woman shrugs* Well you’ve heard of vagina dentata, but I have

    Ungu vagina
    What a wonderful phrase
    Ungu vagina
    Ain’t no passin’ craze.
    It means no nookie
    For the rest of your days…
    It’s a penis free…
    Girl cavity
    Ungu vagina

    ungu vagina ungu vagina…..

  39. kh says:

    this broad better not have a kennel in teh house

  40. natasha b says:

    Back the F off. He’s mine.

Comments are closed.

By posting a comment, you consent to have your personally identifiable information collected and used in accordance with our privacy policy.

↑ Back to Top