Best Dance Review Ever.

Note to those looking for extra more virile men upon which to base extra more virile to the n-th degree heroes: look no further than Los Vivancos and their recent performance as reviewed in the Times.

Note to Laura Vivanco: are you related to all these verily virile manly be-mantittied men? If so, you have been HOLDING OUT ON US LIKE WHOA. The comedy value of your holiday dinners must be incredible, especially if there is The Dancing!

Thanks to Barb Ferrer for the link above and to the video below.

Now, that looks to me like bad flamenco went on a meth bender and slept with Riverdance. Any minute Michael Flatley is going to come prancing across the stage wearing a bolero jacket and some tassels. The sad part is, real flamenco? It’s transfixing on its own. It doesn’t need sweaty oiled man-titty. Much like the tango, it’s erotic and captivating in a way that you don’t see very often. Antonio Gades is hotter in a turtleneck than any of the Vivanco dancers.

(In Spanish with subtitles; check out the dancing – that’s Flamenco, baby. Rwor.)





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  1. 1
    kalafudra says:

    ‘The end of the world will be like this?’ Yes! Maybe it will. We are Los Vivancos. Our virility is total.


    God, how I wish I could see that live…

  2. 2

    What is with the girly new-age hands gestures? 

    The movements are too imprecise for flamenco.  Their coordination is too off – some are quarter beat or more late.  The outfits are awful: a lot of flamenco is about crisp body lines and you can’t make a crisp body lin in a wrinkled shirt.  My ballet teacher would’ve had a heart attack and crawled onto the stage with her metal ruler.

    It’s good they have “virility”, because sorry, there isn’t much else there.

    word: strong36.  Strong, not so much, actually.

  3. 3
    MaryKate says:

    I particularly liked when they all gathered (posed?) in stage left and did the crossed leg hop thing over to the middle of the stage. Like they all really had to pee or something.

    And the guy with the red boxer shorts. I was watching this with a colleague and she asked, “So, do you have have a poster of ALL of them? Or is it just one guy? And how do you tell the difference, by their strategically ripped jeans?” Good point.

  4. 4
    robinjn says:

    The video of Antonio Gades reminds me of Strictly Ballroom, which is a must rent if you haven’t yet seen it. Incredible Baz Luhrmann film, much better, IMO than Moulin Rouge (and I liked Moulin Rouge).

  5. 5

    Note to Laura Vivanco: are you related to all these verily virile manly be-mantittied men?

    No, they’ve got an “s” on the end of their surname. I’ve not got any connection with the makers of computer/electronic equipment, either.

  6. 6

    The first video?  Eh!  But Antonio Gades!  Wow!!!  Thanks for sharing when it’s not even Friday.  What a treat!

  7. 7
    Bonnie C says:

    It’s a bit like Chippendales vs. Baryshnikov – the former is meant titillate and entertain; the latter is captivating power and control. Both absolutely vaild in thier contexts, but I know which one *I* prefer.

    Thanks SB Sarah for the eye candy to go with my morning coffee.

    Oh, and i could really have done without the heaving bosom lady.

    And anyone else notice the Joss Whedon quote at the beginning of the Gades video? The Master is appearing everywhere lately, no?

    word: see67 – LOL

  8. 8
    Suze says:

    Strictly Ballroom, which is a must rent if you haven’t yet seen it

    My most favouritest movie EVAH!  Rent it, buy it, watch it again and again.

  9. 9
    Chicklet says:

    robinjn got it in one: the difference between Los Vivancos and Antonio Gades is like the difference between the real paso doble and the ballroom-approved one. It’s the difference between feeling something and performing it.

  10. 10

    Mmmmmmmmmm, Gades.  Devour me, baby!

    I do like the shameless posturing of the [badly dancing] Vivancos, if I tell myself that every glad hands, objectifying move is a blow against the patriarchy.

  11. 11
    robinjn says:

    Well if you haven’t seen Strictly Ballroom it’s about what happens when the glitz and surface flash of ballroom dancing clashes with dance as a passionate art form. AND it’s brilliantly funny, AND it’s hawt.

    Trust me, rent it, you’ll love it.

  12. 12

    Did anyone else think Solid Gold when they all clumped together in a group to posture?  Since it started out that way, I just kept thinking about them in lamme.

  13. 13
    mearias says:

    I don’t really get the whole flamenco thing.  My sister was obsessed for years, maybe that’s why.  I never got into stuff she liked, just on principle.  BUT I really did love Strictly Ballroom.  Love that movie.

  14. 14
    Tabzie says:

    Flamenco is the way dancing should be.  Sexy, alluring, and powerful.  And you don’t even need two people for it to be le awesome.  Watching flamenco makes me wish I had a modicum of grace, or a man who would be my Antonio Gades.

  15. 15
    Zeba says:

    Ahhhhhh!!! I loved that Carmen movie sooooo much. It came out the year I was 21 and I saw it 7 times. And at my 21st party, a friend arranged for an impromptu acting troupe to come and act out the story around our house. What memories. And that Farruca was one of my favourite dance moments ever.

    I love the Saura movie of Blood Wedding too – just as gorgeous and passionate.

    The Vivancos are really not in the same league – but they are fun to watch, because they do thunder and roar. What a hoot.

    Thank you.

  16. 16
    Esri Rose says:

    Mercy! I had to fan myself after that second video. The Verrucas were a real yawn.

    Strictly Ballroom—I’m a proud owner. A perfect film.

    Off to look at the store!

  17. 17
    Barb Ferrer says:

    The real humor with Los Vivancos, is to read the review first (preferably, imagining it with an Antonio Banderas sort of accent) and then watch the video.  It is made of hilarity.

    But Gades??  Le YUM

    And Strictly Ballroom is one of the most perfect film ever.

    Scott and Fran’s Paso Doble gives me goosebumps, Every. Single. Time.

  18. 18
    Esri Rose says:

    Zeba said:

    And at my 21st party, a friend arranged for an impromptu acting troupe to come and act out the story around our house.

    I want your friends!

  19. 19
    kalafudra says:

    I got home and was finally able to watch the videos.

    The first one: I especially love the zombie flamenco at about 3:15… great stuff.

    The second one: Saura’s Carmen version is pure hotness. A great film.

    And I need to get Strictly Ballroom right now. I don’t know why I’ve never seen that one…

  20. 20

    Wow, reviewer, tell us how you really feel!

  21. 21
    megalith says:

    That review was filled with hilarious.

    After briefly watching Los Vivancos myself…well, I think there’s a production of West Side Story somewhere in Spain which is missing its Jets. I kept hearing the music from the rumble scene in my head.

  22. 22
    EmmyS says:

    Strictly Ballroom is fantastic! I caught it on late-night cable once when I couldn’t sleep, and loved it so much I bought the DVD. There’s a cute mockumentary on the DVD’s special features. And it actually convinced my then-boyfriend that dancing can be masculine. Yes, he was one of those…

  23. 23
    Bonnie L. says:

    Ah, Strictly Ballroom.  I watched it one day in high school when I was sick and I have never been so glad to be sick in my life.  That is a beautiful movie in every way, and funny, too.  When Frannie’s dad is teaching Scott about where the heart of the dance should be felt and is pounding the beat into his chest, ah.  Must. Go. Get. Movie. Now.

  24. 24
    Wryhag says:

    Ah, the Farruca.  I need it.  And when las mujeres they see it, they want me to eat them! 

    I just really wish Gades’s shirt hadn’t made his ribcage so prominent.  I found it distracting.  And occasionally, I thought he was on the verge of sliding into a moonwalk. 

    But seriously, I’ve loved flamenco since I was a kid.  It’s always transfixed me.  I’m not gonna complain too much about the guys in the first vid, because . . . well, hey, pecs and abs are pecs and abs, and I’ll take ‘em when I can git ‘em.  And at least the dancers moved their damned arms!

  25. 25
    Annabella says:

    Check out Al Pacino doing the tango in Scent of a Woman. That’s sex.  I doubt this link will work (I’ve never done this before), but maybe someone else can post it successfully.)

  26. 26
    Susan/DC says:

    Watching the Carmen video brought back my college days when I studied history and read how the English settlers in the American southwest were appalled at how the Spanish settlers danced—it’s hard to ignore the fact that dancing is mating when dancing looks like that.

  27. 27
    Tina C. says:

    well, I think there’s a production of West Side Story somewhere in Spain which is missing its Jets.

    That line made me laugh out loud!  Too funny.

    You know, as I watched the first video, I could almost swear that it was a Spinal Tap-type mockumentary about a Riverdance-esque troupe of Spanish flamenco dancers who are all brothers.  Seriously—the over-wrought opening with the flashing spots, the oh-so-moody blue lighting, the dramatic smoke, the ridiculous hand gestures, and the oiled up pecs and abs?  Toss in the sloppy footwork and their complete inability to stay in synq with each other and I would have sworn that it was a parody of some kind.  Are we sure that these guys are for real?

    So, is the second video from a movie?  And if so, what is it about and is it worth renting?

    Finally, I completely agree about Strictly Ballroom.  I loved that movie!

  28. 28
    SusanL says:

    When I watched Los Vivancos, I kept asking “Why?”

    I loved the clip from Carmen.  I remember watching this YEARS ago.  Click on the link at the bottom of the clip and watch the clip titled La Tabacalera, Carmen – SauraTHAT is the dance that sticks with me 20 years later.  It is long, but it is SO worth it.

  29. 29
    rooruu says:

    While you’re all justifiably swooning over Strictly Ballroom (I was fortunate enough to see the original stage production, which came before the film), let me prompt you to some other Australian blokes dancing: Tap Dogs.  Like here:  Excellently fine stuff.  The Tap Dogs also were part of the 2000 Olympics opening ceremony.

  30. 30
    Ellie says:

    Oh my.  Vivancos.  If you put it on mute, and hum “Thriller” to yourself, it really adds to the comedy.

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