Smart Bitch Contest: Advertise your New Romantic Comedy

Here at Smart Bitch HQ, there’s a driving rhetoric behind our blog. Yes, we have A Nefarious Agenda. I kinda thought it was obvious, but really, I can spell it out:

1. We love romance. You can’t put us down for loving it. You can’t even call us bitches ‘cause, lookee there, we already did.

2. We want good romance to read. And we want to spread the word about the good romance because the good romance makes us panty in our happy parts.

So! In an effort to further Our Nefarious Agenda, readers like Lori offer up brilliance that, as Lori so rightly says, could make for some awesome, wacky, romantic comedy.

Seems there’s some artist in Finland who likes to bike around inside a giant vulva.

What we have here is a Google-translated article from Finland, but really, that picture is worth a thousand translated words.

Except for maybe these six words: “Cunt brings the art of anything.”

I think that phrase might hold the secrets of the universe. Or at least the secret as to why the Pens didn’t win the Stanley Cup.

But on the whole (ha!) this is romantic comedy gold. Biking vulvas that bring the art? One can only assume they also bring the noise and the funk. So you know what this means?

Smart Bitch Contest!

Write us up some advertisement copy for a radio ad promoting your new romantic comedy, a comedy which, obviously, features bikes, vulvas, possibly art, and certainly cuntular hilarity. Celebrity endorsements? Hyperbolic statements? Bring it on! Bring us the finest meats and cheeses, plus a 200 word promotional radio advertisement for your book, and send it to Sarah (sarah @ by midnight tomorrow night, 10 June, Eastern time. I’ll be putting up the advertisements for your judging, and we’ll pick us a winner.

Prizes? Man, it would be cool if I could give away a bike, but alas, that isn’t in my inner tube. How about a $25 gift certificate to Powell’s or Amazon, your choice, and the CD audio book of Christina Dodd’s Some Enchanted Evening.

Pedal on, Bitches, Pedal on.

Comments are Closed

  1. 1
    elianara says:

    That’s not a good translation. The sentence Cunt brings the art of anything is actually F**k, that’s not art.

  2. 2
    Ehren says:

    lol to the translation program’s credit, as I recall Finnish isn’t the easiest to translate to English.

    doesn’t take away from the wtf-ery of the whole thing. >.>

  3. 3
    SB Sarah says:

    Elianara: That just makes it even more gooder! 230% more gooder!

    It’s like the best cocktail conversation ever.

    Pretentious doofus #1: Cunt brings the art of everything!
    Drunken realist: Fuck, that’s not art!

  4. 4
    Chanel19 says:

    I just had to click that link.  Why???

  5. 5
    SonomaLass says:

    Biking vulvas that bring the art? One can only assume they also bring the noise and the funk.

    Biking vulvas?  Funny.  Artsy vulvas?  Could be funny.  Noisy vulvas?  Most likely very funny (unless it’s yours).  But funky vulvas?  Ew.

  6. 6
    SonomaLass says:

    Not that I’m obsessing over this or anything, but for those of you like me who were frustrated by the translation, here are two more web sites that discuss the vulva bike taxi in clearer English.  (Oh dear, tries to post linkage, could be bad…)
    This one

    And this one

    My favorite comment:

    If it had windows, would it be a womb with a view? [ducks]

  7. 7
    Fairings says:

    Translation does need some work, but i like the post anyhow. Very entertaining and totally for cool chicks!

  8. 8
    Hieyeglasses says:

    Very strong words regardless of translation flaws =D

  9. 9

    Wow..Those are some hefty words..

  10. 10

    Ouch.. That must have hurt.!

  11. 11
    Luis says:

    Immense stuff..That would have to be powerful.

  12. 12
    Michael says:

    Ouch..That;s painful. Hopefully he would have been strong enough to endure it.
    Biograd apartments

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