I made a Bad Book Pact with Sarah: If she reads and reviews a Cassie Edwards, I’ll read and review Karen Kay’s Red Hawk’s Woman.
I’m 20 pages into the book, and I’m really not sure how much longer I can last, especially because the book is littered with word misuses like these: “At once, Clark’s teeth stopped chattering, the shaking subsisted, and with a long, scraping breath, the elderly gentleman fell back against his bed.”
This is going to hurt. And not even in a fun, kinky way. More like, “getting my finger trapped in the garage door only to have the neighbor lady run over to help me but after finding out the door was stuck, praying loudly to Jesus to take my pain away instead of running to get somebody else to help free the door” levels of pain and comedy.
Man, the things I do for the Internets….
I now must off and look up if my library carries Cassie Edwards. My friends and I have a delightful program where every couple of months she comes from NY and we give each other the worst books we can possibly find. We then proceed to skim them read them or simply guffaw. Ooohhhh! I am excited, and i shall suffer alongside you, Candy and Sarah!
Thanks for the link to Karen Kay’s (call her Kay) site. She very seriously informs us that, contrary to popular belief, the western movies of the 50s got a lot of stuff WRONG about American Indians. Oh noes!! But that’s where I get all my historical information!
Also? There’s a link to her personal site where you can read all about how Scientology has made her life great. Seriously. (No wonder those Indian guys can’t save the cursed village… they’re all full of body thetans!)
You mean Tonto was fake? *gasp*
I think this might qualify as a author website DON’TS.
So far I have counted…
* politics
* religion
* The George W. Bush Blue Boy Magazine centerfold… oh no, that’s my site.
And her new husband has an honest-to-god mullet! Next she’ll be putting him on a book cover a la Dara Joy or in her advertising, a la LKH.
Teddy Pig, I’d also suggest you add
*Random moments of flipping the fuck out and ranting about how you are an ARTISTE and all your naysayers are evil bitches and/or jealous hags who just don’t understand your ART
to that “Author Don’t”s list, mmmkay?
Oh I thought that’s what I had to do on Karen’s Blog. Dang it, see what you miss when you are not RWA certified.
Back to Karen-call-me-Kay’s website…her Creator only allows one dude per generation to save the village. So why is there a book set in 1834 and one in 1835. That’s a damn short generation! She also has writing tips, but the punctuation on the page is not so correct. There are romance tips, but I’ve been mean enough so I’m not going to comment, irregardless of how “barefoot and in the kitchen” they sound.
Dear Baby Jesus, please don’t tell me she wrote her own website…
“Karen Kay appears to be the physical embodiment of the powerful messages of her books. Looking very much like one of her own heroines—slender, exotic, wearing the flowing dresses she favors with elaborate Indian style jewelry—she moves with grace through every aspect of her life.”
“Wear that negligee he pointed to and laughed about in Sears. “
Sears? Has it come down to Sears? What ever happened the local adult book shop?
Teddypig, I’ve gone through your site and I see no George W. Bush Blue Boy centerfold.
Taybug, that doesn’t sound too different from the author bio I have on my website…
Meet Amelia Elias, mother of sixteen, home health nurse, and author of many stories. (All right, so all but two of those “kids†either have wings or 4 legs—they’re still her babies.) Amelia is slender, buxom, graceful, plays classical piano, speaks 17 languages, is always immaculately dressed, and is titled nobility on an oilrig off the coast of England.
Well, at least the nobility thing is actually true. The oilrig is for sale if you’ve got a spare million or ten, and if you buy it, Amelia hopes you’ll let her keep her title. Please?
Amelia, who is not at all prone to exaggeration or flights of fantasy, writes about everything from genies in a bottle, to gods and goddesses, to gorgeous vampires and hot, sexy Fae. Her stories are set in such locations as Olympus, two versions of an alternate Earth, vampire-owned nightclubs, Australia, various business offices… anywhere she can think of, really. It’s a relief to escape the really, truly crazy place called The Real World.
See? It’s ALL TRUE, people. All of it! … except for the parts that aren’t, of course.