Check out the goofy names here.
Seems a noble historian named Rene Jackaman researched funky names in the local records office in Cornwall after coming across a real life “Horatio Hornblower.”
“Oh, ho!,” thought SB Sarah. A contest beckons!
So SB Candy, in her wily wisdom, created a title generator, which you see below. And we came up with a Smart Bitch Contest!
1. You shall select a name from the Yahoo!News article above
2. You shall generate a title from the script below
3. You shall write the Luuuuuurveâ„¢ scene from the book of that title, featuring that character by name
Entries due: Monday Sept. 19
We shall post an entry with the contestant's submissions, and allow the SBTB Bitchery (that'd be you, noble readers) to vote on the winner. Winners will be announced Friday, Sept. 23.
Since we've been fortunate to receive a lovely number of advertisers (thank you advertisers!), we are able to offer a fabulous pair of prizes!
The winner shall receive a Smart Bitch Titleâ„¢ of their very own, along with a $10 gift certificate to Amazon.com.
So, start your engines, and please email your entries to us – don't post them in the comments. We wouldn't want to miss one accidentally!
In case that article goes offline, here are the names found in the Cornwall County Record Office census records:
Freke Dorothy Fluck Lane
Nicholas Bone and Priscilla Skin
Charles Swine and Jane Ham
John Mutton and Ann Veale
Richard Dinner and Mary Cook
Your next bestseller should be titled: